Guy #1: So I literally threw the books at her. And I said, “What's the point anymore? We fight like cats and dogs every time…”
Guy #2: So maybe we should all move in together in one big house! And we could marry each other's wives!
Guy #3: Yeah! Maybe…?
–17th St & 7th Ave
Trashy high school girl: I'm so glad I'm finally a freshman.
High school boy #1: Why?
Trashy high school girl: Because then I can make out with all the hot jocks.
High school boy #2: Wait… You make out with me.
Trashy high school girl: Yeah, but you're my boyfriend.
–Central Park
Guy #1: So how are things going with your new girlfriend?
Guy #2: Dude–she's not my girlfriend. We're just fucking. And, like… I don't know. She's been acting really weird.
Guy #1: Weird like what?
Guy #2: I don't know! Whatever, man. I guess she and I were better off as siblings.
–McDonald's, Times Square
Overheard by: …that's what she said?
Girlfriend: I just don't get people.
Boyfriend: I love you.
Girlfriend, panicked: No, you don't!
Boyfriend: But I do!
Girlfriend, walking away mumbling: I just do not get people!
–Central Park
Girl #1: But, I like love him so much. I can't not love him, ya know?
Girl #2: You still love him, even though he treats you like crap?
Girl #1: Well, ya know how it is.
Girl #2: Actually, I don't know. Would you care to explain?
Girl #1: I like love him, ya know.
–23rd St & Lexington Ave
Overheard by: A Boyish Girl
Guy: I just don't understand what you see in him.
Girl: He's lazy, irresponsible.
Guy: And stupid!
–Astor Place
Guy to girl: You're going to regret it for the rest of your life if you get the wrong salad.
–SoHo
Overheard by: Confabulation Nation
Slender waitress to two large customers: Make sure you finish *all* of that! Especially the celery. That's my favorite part! (they look in disgust)
–Applebee's, Astoria
Yoga clothes-clad girl, loudly to friend: It is not a vegetable. It's a legume!
–6th Ave & W 12th St
Man to woman: So I sayz, "Lady, you're my cuppa tea alright, but I like the occasional cucumber, if you know what I'm sayin'…"
–Herald Square
Overheard by: Mira
Gay guy: I saw people coming out of the woods and I was like, "Aghhh! Corn children!"
–8th & 45th
Overheard by: i'd be scared, too
Sarah Jessica Parker's son: Do you know what kind of lettuce she likes?
–Washington Square
Overheard by: Brooke
Teenage girl to friend: Boyfriends are so overrated, except not really because I really want one.
–Lincoln Center
Guy: I don't care if her new boyfriend is god–I will kick his ass!
–Church St
Overheard by: Steve
Guy to friend: Yeah, she's in Jamaica. How fucked up is that? She's 20 and in Jamaica with her boyfriend. I'm 25 and I'm standing on a train next to you.
–Metro-North
Art student: I wanna write a diary, like, "8:45, kill boyfriend."
–NYU
Man on street selling knockoff perfume: C'mon ladies, buy this perfume. It will help you get a boyfriend! Don't get a cheap boyfriend, get some cheap perfume!
–34th & 7th
Overheard by: Kiran
Girl to friend: From now on, I am only having sex with one boyfriend.
–Marlow & Sons
Big goofy guy in Yankees jacket: I just need some money for rent.
Little girl with half-braided hairstyle: You told me you wanted me to move on. Why don't you ask your girlfriend for money?
–40th St & 8th Ave
Black teenage girl #1: They're always fighting and everything! Bunch of sorry-ass boyfriends we got!
Black teenage girl #2: Like they all proud of their scars 'n shit.
Black teenage girl #3: I think we oughtta do the Lysistrata thing!
Black teenage girl #1: Say what?
Black teenage girl #3: (whispers something to friend)
Black teenage girl #1: Oh, I could never do that!
–Downtown 2 Train
