Guy: You got something on your face.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: EBS
Guy: You got something on your face.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: EBS
Girl #1: So I know some Chinese now.
Girl #2 Really?
Girl #1: Yeah. I learned how to say our phone number from hearing you order food all the time.
–1 train
Overheard by: Karl Sturmgewehr
Grandma: Who is that? What’s the commotion about?
Teen girl: It’s Paris Hilton.
Grandma: Who is that?
Teen girl: She’s a media blowjob, Nana. Let’s get a move on, we’re
late and Daddy’s waiting for us at the hotel.
–41st & 6th
Overheard by: Brian Otano
Woman: Um…excuse me…But…are you all right?
Teen boy: Juilliard audition!
–JFK
Overheard by: Sydney M
Girl on cell: Can you hear me when I roll my eyes?
–82nd & York
Chick on cell: It’s a long story involving a lot of urine, but the gist of it is, we can’t use that refrigerator ever again.
–Madison Square Garden ladies’ room
Teen girl: Where’s your section for books about hippies?
–Barnes & Noble, 82nd & Broadway
Overheard by: Joseph O’Connell
Teen guy: You owe me a buck, I didn’t complain about gettin’ no ass all day.
Teen girl: How about a blowjob instead?
Teen guy: You serious?
Teen girl: Sure…
Teen guy: I bet you wouldn’t be good anyways. It’s a whole dollar.
Teen girl: Well, you missed out…
Teen guy: How about you come to my roof sometime?
Teen girl: Man-whore.
Teen guy: You can’t call me that, I haven’t gotten any ass in months.
Teen girl: Ha, ha. I get more ass than you!
–E train
Overheard by: teenagersarefunny
Teen boy: What you readin’?
Hasidic man: It’s the Bible in Hebrew.
Teen boy: Oh…Where’d you get it?
Hasidic man: In a store that sells books in Hebrew.
–F train
Guy on cell: I don’t think it’s time yet to do the professional intervention thing. I mean if she drops down below 90, then maybe it’s time. But I’d like to her get down to 95, then she would be hot. As long as she doesn’t lose those 5 in her tits. Shit, she has nice tits.
–Whole Foods, Union Square
