Wednesday One-Liners Are So Hot Right Now

Big muscular man on cell: It's so damn hot, I'm glad I'm not wearing makeup.

–Outside Tribeca Deli

Overheard by: Akiko

Conductor: This is 42nd Street, Times Square. Number 3 train across the platform. Get it while it's hot!

–Downtown 1 Train

Elderly black woman to no one in particular: It's so hot my pussy is melting!

–12th & Broadway

Overheard by: lemchek

Enthusiastic girl: As soon as I saw his name in lights! His name is so hot! So I have to marry him!

–Thompson & W 3rd St

Guy: I'm telling ya that it was so damn hot in there that my balls rolled out from under my towel and fell on the floor… like they was trying to escape or something.

–Starbucks

Dude to friend: I wanna say she's hot… But I mean she looks like the type of girl who accepts Discover.

–The Village

Posted on October 5, 2017
Advice, All Wednesday One-Liners, Black People, Body Parts, Conductors, Friends, Girls, Guys, Heat, Jocks, Makeup, Marriage, Men, Names, NYC Geography, Old People, On Cell, On the Subway, Public Transportation, Restaurants & Cafes, Sexuality, Starbucks, The Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport

What's So Great Aboot Wednesday One-Liners, Eh?

Man on subway, about to exit: Obama, Islam, Canada. Obama, in Islam, and Canada. (exits train)

–Downtown D Train

Overheard by: katiekatydid

Thug to tourists: How do you say "thank you" in Canadian?

–34th & 7th Ave

Overheard by: Fluent in Canadian

Student: I'm so sick and tired of your Canadian condescension.

–Eugene Lang College

Crazy Brooklynite at a payphone: The Queen owns everything! She owns Europe, she owns Africa, and she owns Canada! The one thing she doesn't own is the US. So could somebody give me a US quarter for a Canadian quarter?

–Broadway & 8th St

Ditzy blonde to another: Do we look Canadian?

–Chelsea

Overheard by: Holls

Posted on October 4, 2017
All Wednesday One-Liners, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, College, Crazies, Foreigners, Girls, Gripes, Islam, Languages, Money & Class, Offers and requests, On the Subway, One-liners, Physical appearance, President, Questions, Students, The Village, Thugs, Tourism, Tourists, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness

Is That a Challenge?

Man hawking straw hats: Hats, 10 dollars! Two for 15!
Man walking by: 10 dollars! For 10 dollars, there should be a feather.
Man hawking straw hats: You want a feather? Catch a bird!

–Bleecker & Thompson

Overheard by: meli$$a

Posted on September 26, 2017
Birds, Clothing, Comebacks, Customers, Money & Class, The Village, Vendors & Street Performers

That'd Be Awful– Really Cool to See, Though

Volunteer with clipboard: Do you have a minute to help the environment?
Suit on cell: Fuck the environment, I hope the shit blows up!

–14 St b/w 5th & 6 Ave

Posted on August 31, 2017
Activists, Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, Animals & Nature, Insults, Offers and requests, On Cell, Suits, The Village, Weirdness, Wishes & desires

She Should Give Her Mouth a Rest…or Use It More

Chick #1: …so we fucked and then he didn’t call.
Chick #2: And you’re surprised? This is the third guy in 2 weeks who hasn’t called.
Chick #1: I know, but why don’t they ever call?
Chick #2: Probably because–don’t hate me for this, k?–but you’re kind of easy.

–Garden of Eden, 14th Street

Posted on August 27, 2017
Delis, Girlfriends, One Night Stand, Promiscuity, Sex & Relationships, The Village

Wednesday One-liners Are #1!

B&T guy: Just go to Urban Outfitters and take a piss in the dressing room then.

–6th Avenue & 8th Street

Overheard by: ja

Posted on August 20, 2017
B & T, One-liners, Pee, The Village

Or Thinking Too Hard

Beautician #1: Do you smell burning hair?
Beautician #2: Maybe we’re walking too fast.

–3rd & MacDougall, the Village

Posted on July 14, 2017
Barbers and hairdressers, Fitness, Hair, Scents of the City, The Village

Ask Her If She Knows Lena

Two guys are speaking Russian.

Girl: Are you guys from Russia?
Guy #1: Yes.
Girl: No way! My grandma’s from Germany.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: MP

Posted on June 29, 2017
Manhattan, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, Stupidity, The Village

She Means the Greeks

Chick: How come we’re always talking about how the Jews were persecuted? Lots of people have been persecuted. My people have been persecuted, too.
Professor guy: Um…This is “Introduction to Jewish-American Literature”.
Chick: …Yeah, but still.

–Waverly Building, Waverly Place

Posted on June 15, 2017
College, Jews, Manhattan, Stupidity, The Village

Wednesday One-Liners Are Here, They’re Queer, They’re Not Going Anywhere

Woman: And you are not a lesbian either! You are only gay on weekends.

–Union Square

Overheard by: Adam Bozarth

Teen girl: I know Jimmy’s not gay because he stole my girlfriend.

–R train

Preacher: Mark my words–by sunrise you will be smothered in lesbians.

–53rd & 5th

Overheard by: Kaleena

Thoughtful guy: I always thought that if I were gay I’d be the manlier one. But now that I think about it I’d want to be the girly one for all the free stuff.

–26th & 1st

Overheard by: Charles

Guy on cell: Wait…Christ! It’s gayer than three snaps in Z formation in here.

–The Hangar, Christopher St

Overheard by: TK

Midwestern guy: That is complete bullshit! How do you make a dog gay?

–Century 21

Teen girl: It’s funny talking to him now. I mean, in the eighth grade we knew he was gay, but not take-it-up-the-butt gay.

–Uptown 1 train

Posted on June 12, 2017
All Wednesday One-Liners, Christianity, Gays and Lesbians, Lesbians, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Midwesterners, On the Subway, Queers, Religion, Teens, The Village, Union Square and East Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Women