Asian suit: They were talking about how these 7th grade girls were trading blowjobs for pot.
White suit: When I was in 7th grade, I didn’t even know what pot was, or what blowjobs were. I was too busy playing video games and watching Star Wars.
Asian suit: I was in SAT prep class.
–51st & Lexington
White girl #1: You know that guy in the purple shirt we were talking to on the train? I think I know him.
White girl #2: Wait, you mean the guy in the black shirt?
White girl #1: No, his shirt was purple…the black guy, y’know?
WHite girl #2: I really think his shirt was black…
White girl #1: Sweetie, that was his face.
–168th Street station
Overheard by: Cheese Monkey
Black guy: Yo, can I get a dollar for a hot dog?
White guy: Sorry. This is my last fiver.
White woman: Here ya go.
Black guy: That’ll do.
White woman: You could at least say thank you.
Black guy: I did. I was speaking ebonics.
–Gray’s Papaya, 8th Avenue
Overheard by: CRE
A white girl listening to her iPod snaps to attention, horrified, as the conducter announces the stop at 135th Street.
White girl: Oh my God! Where am I?
–2 train
Overheard by: emilie
White girl: I’m sorry, I don’t have any money.
Black guy: I didn’t ask you for nuthin’, lady!
–57th & Lexington
Woman #1: And what about the vacation?
Woman #2: It was great. But I’m so glad to be back on firma terra cotta.
–42nd & Lexington
Overheard by: Ellen Beckerman
Fat White drunk woman: Maybe you got it from someone in our building, or all those transvestites you fucked.
Sobbing Hispanic man: But baby, I didn’t fuck that many, it’s not my fault!
–Fordham Road, The Bronx
Woman: So how was the blind date?
Man: Ugh, you know. He’s tall, white, and a vegan. The same as every man in this world.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Mike Drucker
White woman: Cough it up, Sadie! Cough it up!…Why would people put chicken bones in the garbage?
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Carrie McLaren
Guy: Hey, how you doin’?
Bum: Ah, shit. It’s the White man!
–116th & Amsterdam
