Sorority chick #1: Hey, you know there’s Bible study in my room at eight tonight?
Sorority chick #2: Hmmm, eight? Okay, I guess I can come.
Sorority chick #1: And then we can go get wasted!
Ladies’ locker room, University of Tennessee
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: New Yorker
Teen girl to friend: You know what I wanna do? Smoke a joint rolled in a page from the bible.
McDonald's
Ohio
Overheard by: Dylan
Guy: … Because the pope touches himself. That’s my answer for the first question. That’s my answer to any question, really.
History class
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia
Overheard by: Kaiti
Mother (giving four-year-old a children’s bible): Here, find Jesus for mommy.
Doctor’s Office
Ashland, Kentucky
Overheard by: Lola
Tour guide: Where is your group going next?
Tourist: The Vatican.
Tour guide: Oh? You are lucky, the Pope is not there.
Florence
Italy
Overheard by: Burlabo
Drunk white guy making out with Indian girl, shouting at a guy with Christian slogans: Oi! Oi! Christians fuck off!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Woman: Do you like your daycare?
Little girl: It’s okay. They’re Christian, but they’re really mean.
Austin, Texas
Teen girl #1: He offered it to me in church–I mean, who offers someone marijuana in church?
Teen girl #2: When else could he do it?
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Colleen
Teen girl #1: If he was Jewish, he’d be so less Christian, and then he’d be hot.
Teen girl #2: Exactly! I mean, I’d bang him if he just said ‘damn’ every now and then.
Teen girl #1: But nooo, he just has to channel Jesus for us every day.
High school party
Virginia
Priest: Their first love has brought them so many tears and grief… and black eyes. But they will love again!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
