Hobo: I'm so hungry. I ain't eaten nothing since yesterday.
Kind-hearted woman: Here, take the other half of this sandwich.
Hobo: Sorry, I don't eat carbs. Those shits don't do nothing but make you fat.
–Ditmars & 31st, Astoria
Overheard by: Allison
Hobo: I'm so hungry. I ain't eaten nothing since yesterday.
Kind-hearted woman: Here, take the other half of this sandwich.
Hobo: Sorry, I don't eat carbs. Those shits don't do nothing but make you fat.
–Ditmars & 31st, Astoria
Overheard by: Allison
Queen #1: Well, you know she's bulimic now, right?
Queen #2: I know! It's so sad! Once she loses all that weight she's just going to figure out she has an ugly face.
–N Train
Overheard by: Andrea
Four-year-old: Doorman 1 is fat.
Mom: No he's not. Who said that?
Four-year-old: Doorman 2.
Mom: Well, doorman 2 is wrong. Doorman 1 is just a bigger guy. He's just bigger than doorman 2. He's not fat.
Four-year-old: Yes he is.
Mom: No he's not. Who are you going to believe, me or doorman 2?
Four-year-old: Doorman 2.
–Riverside Drive
Fat woman, stopping sales lady: Hold up. Where are all the clothes for fat teenagers?
Sales lady: Uhh…uhh…7th floor.
–Macy's, Herald Square
Guy #1 (reading newspaper): The fattest city in America: Virginia.
Guy #2: That's not a city.
Guy #1: Oh. I meant West Virginia.
Guy #2: That's still not a city.
–112th & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: It's not?
Big girl: Eww! I miss the days I went out with Eric.
Friend: Why? He was an asshole!
Big girl: He took me out so much, I swear I went to every cool spot in New York City.
Friend: Wait, so bascially he wined and dined you?
Big girl: Yep!
Friend: What the fuck, I thought fat girls didn't get wined and dined!
–Coffee Shop, Union Square
20-something, beating his chest and coughing: John, don't die…you're too young, you're too beautiful, the world needs you to stay alive!
–55th & Madison Ave
Overheard by: Jesus Jon
Girl on phone: I just don't see why he doesn't want to do me.
–NYU
Lab assistant on phone: I mean, I love the way I look. And they way I talk…well, that's fine. But that laugh? Dear god.
–NYU Computer Lab
Overheard by: meli$$a
Man on cell: So that's it? You're genetically superior to her, case closed?
–5th Ave & 16th St
Overheard by: Prof. Creepyhugz
Tall black guy to shorter, buff black guy: It's not about your looks or the way you're built: you've got charisma, you've got something that draws people to you. I know because I've got it too.
–Planet Sushi, Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: Suze V
Female student, walking in: Okay! The princess is back and she feels ten pounds lighter!
–Borough Manhattan Community College Computer Lab
Overheard by: Steve
Teen girl #1: I love our lunch. Cheez-Its, frosting, and water.
Teen girl #2: At least we didn't get soda.
Teen girl #1: Yeah, I feel fat.
–Duane Reade
Overheard by: Jmo
Tiny six-year-old son: Why do I look so fat?
Mom: (looks puzzled)
Tiny six-year-old son, pointing at his reflection in elevator doors: Look at me, I look fat!
Mom, smiling, relieved: Oh! No, it's just that reflection is distorted, sweetie.
Tiny six-year-old son: Is that why you looked so fat in those pictures?
Mom (after pause): …yes.
–Elevator, Lexington Ave
Older man: Oh, really?
Younger, athletic man: Yeah, yeah. It works. You know, you…your body type, you want to eat meat. You know, for every pound you weigh, you should eat a pound of meat a day.
Older man: You're an idiot.
–92nd & Central Park West
Overheard by: P. Marino
