Girl: That’s funny, I thought you were a finance major.
Guy: I couldn’t stand it. It’s like… numbers and shit.
–6 train
Girl: That’s funny, I thought you were a finance major.
Guy: I couldn’t stand it. It’s like… numbers and shit.
–6 train
Guy holding baby: I’ve decided I’m going to write a pop-up history of the ancient world, based on Herodotus. Should be great for babies.
–Strand Bookstore
American history tutor: The only dictator I know of is Hugo Chavez, and that’s because I met him.
–Jake’s Saloon, 57th & 10th
Overheard by: poor kid’s gonna fail that test
Rich mom with two kids: … And it was named after our country’s first president, Christopher Columbus.
–117th & Broadway
Overheard by: doesn’t get columbus day off
Guy to friend: If I can make it through the ’80s, I can make it through anything.
–Astor Pl
Overheard by: squishduck
Professor: Sigismondo Malatesta was the only person in history to ever be publicly consigned to Hell by the pope. Now, that’s when a pope was a pope. I wish the pope would just get on TV and say, ‘You’re going to Hell!’
–Fordham University – Rose Hill
Overheard by: Christina
Guy: Wait, have I ever told you guys about my irrational fear of the late 1800s?
–NYU dorm
Overheard by: Danimal
Russian Lady: Oh no, he’s too gentle to be a teacher. He went there before and the kids did whatever they wanted. They took everything from the tables.
–D Train
Young Woman #1: I have to go to this “dungeon” for my Sexual Psychology class. Do you want to come?
Young Woman #2 in her mid-twenties: Is it like an S&M thing?
Young Woman #1: I don’t know. It’s like they act out different sexual
fantasies with whips and stuff.
Young Woman #2: OK, that sounds cool.
— Upper East Side
In a coffeeshop in Los Angeles (the Novel cafe in Santa Monica), a tutor is giving a beginning Spanish lesson to a student at the table next to me. The student is reading a newspaper article in Spanish, and then translating each sentence word by word:
Student: “I don’t know what this word, ‘decada’ means”
Teacher: “What do you think it means?”
Student: “I don’t know”
Teacher: “Guess.”
Student: “I really don’t know”
Teacher: “Here’s a hint. It’s very similar to an English word”
Student: “‘Decada’? Deca….. I have no idea”
Teacher: “It’s almost identical to the English word”
Student: “uhhhhh”
Teacher: “There’s only one letter difference”
Student: “deca….?”
Teacher: “C’mon, what do you think?”
Student: “I really have no idea”
(Teacher pinches her on the nose!)
Teacher: “It’s Decade!!!”
Student: “Ahhhhh!!!! Okay! I feel stupid!”
Train Staffer #1: Did you do that terrorism training yet?
Train Staffer #2: No. I’m trying to avoid it.
Train Staffer #1: Yeah. I already missed the first one.
–PATH Train
Russian girl #1: You’re not in my Russian class.
Russian girl #2: Oh, I’m sorry. You have advanced Russian.
Russian girl #1: Everything I have is advanced.
Russian girl #2: Shut up.
–B82 Bus
Young female 20-something to another: Don't you ever learn anything? You can't sleep with your boss!
–42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Eric S
Guy to another, outside Apple store: Well, first you have to find him, then fund him, and then fuck him.
–14th St
Girl on cell: I've had really bad first base that turned into really good sex.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Rob Gioia
Woman in too-tight business suit, screaming into cell: Listen, buddy, I can always find another fuck buddy!
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Nunez
High school student #1: Why did we have to read a book over the summer?
High school student #2: To keep your brain working, dickhead. You should probably try it.
–6 Train
Guy to girl: Yeah, the reason I never wanted to drive drunk in high school is cause I didn't want to scratch my car.
Girl: Well, that's shouldn't be the only reason!
Guy: Oh, for sure–but it was a pretty sweet ride.
–62nd St & Lexington
