Crazy hobo: Well, hey baby, you're beautiful!
Pedestrian: I'm a man, dammit, I'm a man!
–9th Ave
Crazy hobo: Well, hey baby, you're beautiful!
Pedestrian: I'm a man, dammit, I'm a man!
–9th Ave
Teenage tourist, pointing: Mom, look! It’s Daryl Hannah!
Mom: Honey, that’s not Daryl Hannah. That’s one of those transgender people.
–Downtown 6 train, 77th St
Overheard by: Anne
Headline by: pontiac
Runners-Up:
·
“As I Always Say, ‘If You Can’t Tell, It Doesn’t Matter.'” – Dave
· “Must Be Nicolette Sheridan’s Day Off.” – seamus
· “Not to Mention She’s still Tied to a Walnut Tree in LA” – Liz!
· “Perhaps the Blade Runner Left an Angry Inch” – megs
· “So That’s Where She Went.” – Eamon Stimson
· “Technically, They’re Both Right” – Wes Mantooth
· “Tom Hanks Thought It Was a Fish Tail.” -peter
· “Who Says ‘Ambiguous’ Isn’t a Classic Look?” –
Dame Droiture
Crazy hobo: Marriage is for having children, and gay people never have children! Marriage is for sex, and gay people never have sex!
Latina: He needs to get fucked up the ass.
–7 Train
Overheard by: Ari
Guy: This place has some really cool stuff.
Girl: (silence)
Guy: But I feel like it mainly has stuff for girls.
Girl: (silence)
Guy: Yeah, so do you know any good bars around here?
Girl: (silence)
Guy: Do you not speak English?
Girl: Oh! You were talking to me?
–Bedford Ave
Preppy teen girl #1: The Twilight Zone is the best show ever!
Preppy teen girl #2: I'm gender confused.
–Toys R Us, Times Square
Cop to others, coming out of bodega: I was into fucking rainbows even before the gays.
–Bedford & S 3rd
Overheard by: Rocky
Tall blue-collar guy to short blue-collar guy: So, how did your date with that guy go? Did you get any action?
–Broadway
Guy on cell: I still don't see how being a dude and preferring other dudes sexually makes me gay.
–Q Train
Hipster on cell: This isn't gay, it's revenge!
–Ave C & 7th St
Guy to friends, matter of factly: So apparently he went there for drugs and/or homosexual sex.
–Rockefeller Center
30-something woman to another: Because she's gay, does that mean I need to pay for everything?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Tom Guest
Girl #1: I refuse to take a Women’s Studies class and lower my morals.
Girl #2: I have a friend in that class, he’s one of 2 guys in there; the rest are all man-haters.
Girl #3: I hear the only way to get an A is to come out during class, or say how you were abused as a child. I’ll stand up in class and say, “I live with my boyfriend but I’m a lesbian; can I have my A now?”
–Pace Unversity
Chick: I should start going to gay bars. I’m tired of going to all these straight bars where guys feel free to rub their penis all over your ass.
–Zabar’s, Broadway & 80th St.
Overheard by: Basil
Woman: Honestly, I wonder what she ended up doing with a 3 foot, papier-mache penis.
–Broadway/Lafayette station
Overheard by: Jaya
Guy: I don’t want to live in a building that undulates!
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Derek
Slutty girl: So, umm… like, can I just go in?
Bouncer: No. There's a line to your left.
Slutty girl: But, like don't girls get to just go in?
Bouncer: Um… this is a boy bar. You definitely have to wait in line.
–The Phoenix
Overheard by: Sean
Electric guy to himself: Where’s my gloves?
Grip guy: Gloves? I don’t use gloves. I use my bare hands like a man! Only pussies use gloves. Are you a pussy? Be a man, ya pussy.
Electric guy: But then my skin will get all dry and crack and stuff.
Grip guy: Duh, well, yeah. That’s why you have to moisturize.
–Movie set of I Am Legend
Overheard by: Another electric guy
