Queer: You remind me of that girl Audrina on the hills!
Girl resembling Audrina: Yeah, I've heard that before. I've also heard Lindsay Lohan, but that's mostly because of my coke habit.
–Splash Bar
Queer: You remind me of that girl Audrina on the hills!
Girl resembling Audrina: Yeah, I've heard that before. I've also heard Lindsay Lohan, but that's mostly because of my coke habit.
–Splash Bar
Guy walking by himself: I wish everybody who is not mentally ill would just drop dead!
–9th St, Park Slope
Overheard by: Rear Admiral Butts
Guy (admiringly, to attractive girl passing by): Damn, girl, I wish you were a guy!
–14th St & 1st Ave
Ditzy girl to another, about her boyfriend: He's teaching himself philosophy right now. He bought a philosophy dictionary. He can do that, you know, because he's so smart. I wish I could do that!
–Astoria
Overheard by: squarehand
Young guy to girl: Dude, I wish Dali was still around so he could do my album.
–Museum of Modern Art
Overheard by: Gino
Serious girl: I wish I had gotten the ovaries!
–Korean Baptist Church, Astoria
Overheard by: Evan
Girl: These fish are big, yo! Or is this tank magnetic?
–Petland, Greenpoint
Overheard by: miles
Girl #1: So I think I may have MS.
Girl #2: You are banned from WebMD! Banned I say!
–Green Kitchen, 76th St
King of single line drawings: Can you make me some copies of these drawings? I am the king of single line drawings.
Copy guy #1: How many do you want?
King of single line drawings: What’s your favorite musical instrument? I’ll make you one right now on the spot. How about that?
Copy guy #1: Piano.
King of single line drawings: …And here you are. What’s your favorite instrument?
Copy guy #2: Saxophone.
King of single line drawings: …And here you are. Hey, you back there! What’s your favorite instrument?
Copy girl: A harp!
King of single line drawings: Oh…anything but a harp!
–Village Copier, 111th & Broadway
Drunk girl, holding hands with a boy and a girl: Oh, this is the bisexual block!
Less drunk friend: Uh… Let's take a picture of this diner so I don't forget it.
–14th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Teri
Girl to homeless man #1: Here is my leftover food, if you want it.
Homeless man #1: Thanks.
Homeless man #2: You stupid bitch, why don't you just give him crack?
–Waverly Place & Broadway
Overheard by: SJP
High school girl #1: Ugh. Sorry about that. Why does everything I say sound so stupid? It's like a disease!
High school girl #2: It is a disease! I saw it on the Discovery Channel.
High school girl #1: Oh my god! Really? I should go see a doctor.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Celia
Tiny hipster girl: So how’s the kneecap?
Hipster guy: Fuckin’ swollen.
Tiny hipster girl: Fuck yeah!
Hipster guy: Yeah. But I’m getting an elephant head tattooed next to my cock!
–Europa, Williamsburg
Overheard by: kneecaps are a real bitch
Bimbette: I don't think I've ever been that grossed out during the day. It all started when that woman smelled like pee…
–6 Train
Overheard by: j
Female suit: We were above an Indian restaurant and he was banging me from behind. I could smell the curry, and while he was banging me I was gagging.
–NJ Transit
Chick: You smell like vag and pizza.
–Borders
Girl to friend, after bending head down into her: Damn my puss stank.
–E Train
Overheard by: Nicole
College guy (screaming at friend): Dude! How are you even in college?! You smell like Oust! You smell like Tropical Glade!
–1 Train
Concerned hipster: I know you just orgasmed, but what's that smell?
–E 9th & 3rd
Overheard by: Peanut
