Hobo: Do you have any spare change?
Guy: Sorry, no.
Hobo: Well, come back when you do.
–Orchard & Houston
Overheard by: Princessbeena
Hobo: Do you have any spare change?
Guy: Sorry, no.
Hobo: Well, come back when you do.
–Orchard & Houston
Overheard by: Princessbeena
Dude: Can I have a plain pizza?
Pizza guy: Is that for here or to stay?
Dude: Yeah.
–Anna Maria’s, Williamsburg
Overheard by: lee
Guy #1: Man, you gotta do more drugs.
Guy #2: Well I was trying last night.
–19th & 5th
Suit #1: I screwed one of the new piece of ass last night.
Suit #2: You mean the li’l one, the new one?
Suit #1: Yeah, Jen, the new girl on 15.
Suit #2: Dude, I just smashed her the other day at lunch! Are you fucking kidding me?
Suit #1: You’re clean, right?…’cause I’m going back for seconds.
–75th & Lexington
Guy: I want to go to FIT so I can hook up with girls.
–27th & 7th
Girl: I mean, I got shat on at Harvard.
–9th Street & 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Kamran Javadizadeh
Woman: Is there a special event going on at Columbia this summer? Because I’ve seen a lot of Asians around.
–116th & Broadway
Overheard by: Carrie
Hipster girl: I mean, I’ve got like, over 160 facebook friends. Does that not mean anything?
–56th & 6th
Overheard by: Joyce Shen
Sociology professor: No one knows what the hell Derrida is talking about, but we all pretend we do anyway.
–Columbia
Overheard by: djlindee
Guy #1: Keep your wallet in your front pocket, dude.
Guy #2: This city would be so much safer if there really were Ninja Turtles.
–A train
Overheard by: Jake Glazier
Teen girl: This one’s kind of cross-eyed.
Teen guy: They’re porn star action figures. What do you want?
Teen girl: I want them to be just as hot as the real thing…and I want them to be glistening.
–Kim’s Video, St. Mark’s Place
Guy: It was hot, I can’t even tell you.
Girl: So you guys slept together?
Guy: Oh yeah, it was hot.
Girl: ’cause I talked to her this morning and she said you guys just cuddled and stuff.
Guy: Yeah, yeah, that’s what I meant by sleeping with her. Y’know, spooning and shit.
–MetroTech Commons
Guy: So you’re saying tuna is really dolphin?
Lady: That’s why it says “Dolphin Safe”. It’s safe to eat even though it’s dolphin.
–Broadway & Worth
Girl: Yesterday I weeded my terrace.
Boy: What?
Girl: I weeded my terrace.
Boy: Oh, I thought you said, “I needed my terrorist.”
–Washington Square Park
