Health and Hygiene

We’ve Found His Beloved Reggaeton

Girl #1: I went to a ghetto reception.
Girl #2: Was she pregnant?
Girl #1: Yeah, and everyone was wearing jeans.

–Q46 bus

Posted on April 9, 2006
Fashion, Health and Hygiene, Money & Class, On the Bus, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Thugs

The Last Word

Teen girl #1: So I gave her her piece.
Teen girl #2: You gave her herpes?
Teen boy #1: No, she gave her her piece.
Teen girl #1: Of chocolate.
Teen girl #2: Ha, ha, ha! “Gave her herpes.” Her piece.
Teen boy #1: Herpes chocolate!
Teen girl #2: Knock, knock.
Teen boy #1: Who’s there?
Teen girl #2: Herpes.
Teen boy #1: Herpes who?
Teen girl #2: Her piece of chocolate!…Hey, Milton! Knock, knock!
Teen boy #2: Who’s there?
Teen girl #2: Herpes!…Milton, you have to say, “herpes who?”!
Teen boy #2: No.
Teen girl #2: You suck, Milton!
Teen girl #1: No, you suck.
Old woman: That’s true.

–1 train

Posted on April 7, 2006
Food, Health and Hygiene, On the Subway, Should've Used a Condom, STDs, Stupidity, Teens

Who Doesn’t Know Their Address?

Girl #1: Why you holding yo’ nose? We all know it smells like piss in here.
Girl #2: I know it smells like piss, I just don’ wanna pick anything else up into my lungs.
Girl #1: You jus’ wiling cause of the piss smell.
Girl #2: Please, the elevator in my building smells like piss. In fact, in my building, I can tell you the apartment number of who pissed in the elevator.

–Fordham Metro-North station elevator

Posted on April 7, 2006
Body Parts, College, Elevators, Etiquette, Fordham, Health and Hygiene, Poop, The Bronx

Tom Petty Has Some Ominous Backstory

Guy #1: Someone shouldn’t be naked in your apartment if you don’t know his name.
Guy #2: Unless he’s a refugee.

–45th & 10th

Overheard by: Nick Salvato

Posted on April 6, 2006
Body Parts, Etiquette, Health and Hygiene, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Real Estate, Relationships

Rapunzel’s Wednesday One-liners

Bag lady: Hey, you guys, can you help me out? I’m really hungry!…You need a dye job, you know! Your roots are showing.

–Park Slope

Overheard by: Drew

Posted on April 5, 2006
Anger Management, Body Parts, Brooklyn, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, College, Drinking & Drunk People, Fashion, Fordham, Friendship, Health and Hygiene, Hipsters, Hobos, Lower East Side, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Murray Hill and Gramercy, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Park Slope, Pop Culture, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Staten Island, Stupidity, The Bronx, Times Square, TV, Union Square and East Village

Wednesday One-liners Will Cost You

Woman: So they’re paying the kidnappers child support? I mean I know they want to support their child, but where is the money going? To those crazy people.

–L train

Overheard by: Kelly Marie

Posted on April 5, 2006
Brooklyn, Crime and Punishment, Etiquette, Health and Hygiene, Jobs & Careers, Kink, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Money & Class, On the Subway, One-liners, Parents, Poop, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Stupidity, Teens, The Village, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport

She’s Getting Surgery Slash Amputation

Drunk chick #1: Dude julia, I just totally stuck my face slash mouth on this pole.
Drunk chick #2: Ew.
Drunk chick #1: Oh, by the way, how are your antibiotics going?
Drunk chick #2: Uh, not so good.

–1 train