RA: No sex in the dorms after curfew!
Girl #1: But what about lesbian sex?
RA: Well, that’s okay, but not in the common room. Unless everyone’s involved. Then it’s okay.
Girl #2: And clean up after yourselves!
–Columbia University
RA: No sex in the dorms after curfew!
Girl #1: But what about lesbian sex?
RA: Well, that’s okay, but not in the common room. Unless everyone’s involved. Then it’s okay.
Girl #2: And clean up after yourselves!
–Columbia University
Guy on cell: My doctor told me if you piss right after sex, you can’t get STDs…Yeah, I do it all the time.
–Suffolk & Rivington
Overheard by: John
Loud teen girl: Wait, you had a dream that you had AIDS? That I had AIDS? Fuck you, man.
–Brighton Beach, Brooklyn
Chick on cell: I know it’s sick, but I’m so excited that I can have unsafe sex now!
–23rd Street & Broadway
Overheard by: Becka Dash
Concerned citizen: Excuse me, I don’t know if this is a trans-generational or New York metropolitan faux pas, but you should really tell your friend, girlfriend, lady friend or whatever that one in every four persons in America has herpes.
–sushi restaurant, 1st Ave
Overheard by: Caitlyn
Girl: Oh, and in French, they say-
Guy: -I don’t care.
Girl: This date has been awful.
Guy: Shut up!
–78th & Broadway
Guy: Yeah, that’s the first thing I learned when I moved here: don’t eat street meat, it’s probably pigeon or something.
Girl #1: Yeah, I wish I could get my husband to stop eating it.
Girl #2: I don’t care what kind of meat it is as long as it’s in my mouth.
Girl #1: That’s my sister; she’s looking for a hook-up.
Girl #2: No, I’m not!
Guy: I’m married.
–Irving Plaza, Irving Place
Overheard by: Johnny Tremain
Queer #1: Anyway, Rico spent Friday night with that tattooed guy and they were hanging out again last night…Though, when Rico said hello to me, there was a look in his eyes that said, “I’m with this guy for the weekend, sorry, I’d much rather get to know you, but I’ve sorta made my bed now and must lie in it…please wait for me…”
Queer #2: Is this the point where you ask me whether you read too much into things?
–The Roxy, West 18th Street
Teen girl: I wouldn’t call me bi but more curious. Nut when I was fooling around with her I thought to myself, “I’d definitely do this again.”
–1 train
Overheard by: Mike Smith
Guy #1: Tell em’ what I did.
Guy #2: Pissed on her.
Guy #1: I pissed on her face while she was sleeping!
–Coney Island Boardwalk
Overheard by: Kate C.
Girl: When we were younger, we totally took for granted the fun in playing Spin the Bottle…I would love to play now but it wouldn’t be the same.
Man: Yeah, playing now would just end with an abortion two months later.
Girl: Ugh.
–Broadway & 46th
Overheard by: Jeff Rigby
HS girl: So how was your love life over the summer?
HS boy: I hooked up with the Prime Minister of Georgia’s daughter.
–67th & Amsterdam
