Pretty orthodox Jewish girl #1: Man, if I wasn't religious, I would be such a slut.
Pretty orthodox Jewish girl #2: I hear ya.

–Kings County Hospital

Overheard by: awesome sauce

Med student guy #1: Wait up, you’re saying that nearsighted means you can’t see far? But it should, like, mean that you can’t see near.
Med student guy #2: Yeah, I know, it’s like backwards or something.

–Columbia-Presbyterian Medical Center, West 168th Street

Woman, 70s: …she’s had a heart attack, her legs don’t work, and on top of all that, she’s crazy!

–St. Vincent’s Hospital elevator

Overheard by: Jay Parkinson

Junkie #1: He’s a millionaire…just gives his money away. He’s a Jew bastard. But he writes his check like a chicken scratch.
Junkie #2: Oh, they can’t write anyway.

–Meth clinic, 161st Street

Five-year-old black girl: Let's play I spy!
Six-year-old black girl: I spy… Something brown!
Five-year-old black girl: The chair!
Six-year-old black girl: No.
Five-year-old black girl: The door!
Six-year-old black girl: No.
Five-year-old black girl: Us!
Six-year-old black girl: No… We're black, stupid!

–Waiting Room, Eye & Ear Hospital

Intake worker: Mother's first name?
Patient: Cynthia.
Intake worker: And your father's?
Patient: Yeah, I don't know that, dude.

–ER, St. Luke's

ER Dr : What's your boyfriend's last name?
Bimbo: I don't know, but we're friends on Facebook, I could look it up.

–Beth Israel Emergency Room

Overheard by: Doc_Becca

Suit to guy in scrubs: How did you find her hemorrhoid?
Guy in scrubs: I gave it to her up the ass last night.
Suit: Win-win, I guess.

–Elevator, Mount Sinai Hospital

Overheard by: ECW

Black lady to family in obama t-shirts: You know how all those irish people have pictures of kennedy hanging up in their living rooms? Now we can do that too!

–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Definitely has a JFK picture in her apartment

Guy selling obama-themed condoms: Remember the election with every erection!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Mary Button

Black woman with a child in her stroller braiding her hair: There's gona be a lot of braidin in the white house.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Subway surfer

Woman on cell phone: Girl, if I can get to the front of the line at the vma's I can get to the front of the line at the damn inauguration. Shiiiit it's barack obama, girl!

–manhattan dental waiting room

Overheard by: Catherine

Stoned kid to a group of his friends discussing politics: You know what's scary bro? If obama gets assassinated, george bush is gonna be president again.

–1 Train @ 2AM going Downtown

Black man handing out metro: "get your obama metro! Get your obama metro! See, anyone can be president… I'm next!"

–59th Street, Lexington Ave

Overheard by: Yes we can!

Blonde to brunette: So that made it even worser… Worser? More worse? Or is it just worse? Noooo. Worser. Or just worse? No! More worse. Worser?

–Downtown 1 Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Agitated young man: I was dramatized by all dat what just happen … dramatized, son. Dramatized.

–Hospital, 10th Ave

Overheard by: tinyfoo

Obese woman pushing stroller: Yo! I told you I don't wanna hear noes, ifs, ants, or buts about it.


Overheard by: john ainley

Young French lady: We are gonna weaponised a pumpkin!

–French Consulate, Upper East Side

Overheard by: James