Hipster girl: Gosh, I’m like Pavlov’s dog!
Guy: What the hell is that?
Hipster girl: You don’t know? They teach it in, like, every science class ever!
Guy: So, what is it?
Hipster girl: It has something to do with bells and drool, I’m not really sure.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Tres Chic
Waiter: May I take your orders, or do you need a few more minutes?
Guy: Um, we had a waitress come by and take our drink orders…
Waiter: Yes, well, I can take your food order if you’re ready.
Guy: What happened to our waitress?
Waiter: She quit.
–Aquavit, East 55th Street
Overheard by: Not telling
Chick #1: So yeah, all this time I’ve never had PMS before. Like ever. Now that all this hormonal shit is going on, it all caught up with me this past week.
Chick #2: What do you mean?
Chick #1: I’ve been eating M&M’s, Fritos, chocolate-covered pretzels, and Powerade this entire week, and I can’t go 10 minutes without crying.
Chick #2: Are you prego?
Chick #1: No, I think I just fucking won the endocrine lottery.
–Times Square shuttle
Overheard by: Glynnis O
Technician: It will cost a hundred and fifty dollars to have our technicians look at it.
Girl with computer problem: A hundred and fifty dollars?! No way. I’d rather spend that on alcohol.
–Apple Store Genius Bar
Overheard by: becca
Voice over PA, as train is pulling out of the station: How you gonna let your child run around like that? You call yourself a mother? I could’ve closed the doors on your child and then what? You would’ve been all sad and shit but I was nice, I chose to keep the doors open. You call yourself a mother… lettin’ your child run around on the subway…
–1 train
Overheard by: LSB
Guy selling belts: Getcha belts here! Five dollahs! Belts! Only FIVE DOLLAHS!
Touristy man passes by with 10-year-old son.
Guy selling belts: Getcha belts to hitcha kids with! Talking to them don’t work!
–W 65th St
Guy #1: You get married, so someone else can make your decision.
Guy #2: No, I got married so I can make someone else's decisions also!
–Broadway
Overheard by: Rina
Latina: People are always saying I look Asian. Do you see it?
Asian guy: Well, you know, Mexicans look a lot like Asians.
White girl: Yeah, they have those same narrow eyes.
Asian guy: And they’re short.
–Amy’s Bread, Bleecker Street
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Crazy guy: Jodie Foster is a top notch actress!
Girl: Okay.
Crazy guy: Julia Roberts is going down!
Girl: Are they going to fight?
–Shubert Theater, West 44th Street
Loud guy: They’re both really pretty.
Girl: Yeah, sure.
Loud guy: Sure, they’ve got busted noses, but they’re still really pretty.
–Chola Restaurant, 58th St, between 2nd & 3rd Ave
