Movies

Wednesday One-Liners Just Need to Walk It Off

Large bald man on Bluetooth: He got a fuckin' boo boo, that's all!

–Gramercy

Suit on cell: So, I haven't been electrocuted…yet.

–L Train

Elderly woman: I regret that she broke her arm. I do not regret pushing her down the stairs.

–E Train

Overheard by: Pat

Little boy: I hope the boo-boo goes away soon! My staple won't hold that long!

–23rd & Park Ave

Overheard by: Say what?

Guy on train to friend: Hey, would you still date a girl if she was in an industrial accident and had to wear a Darth Vader suit forever?

–6 Train

And All Those Michael Moore ‘Documentaries’

Guy #1: Are you gonna go see Saw 3?
Guy #2: Nah, I’m not into movies like that.
Guy #1: Why not?
Guy #2: I’m more into dramas — you know, movies where you can actually believe that what’s happening is real. Like Superman.

–Madison Square Park

Overheard by: Don Willmott

Sure, Why Not?

Girl #1, in Spanish: Yesterday I saw the movie The History of Violence.
Girl #2: Hey, is that the one about the penguins?

–Spanish class, Stuyvesant High School

Overheard by: Espanola

A Guy's Not Allowed to Make a Radom Observation?

Young boyfriend, as Madonna's “holiday” comes on: You know, I have always hated Pat Benatar.
Older girlfriend, spitting out beer: Well, that's good honey, because this is Madonna.
Tattooed bartender chick: Pathetic.

–Lower East Side

Overheard by: Cougar Hunter

“Things That a Wife Would Say”?

Guy #1: Alanis Morissette wrote a song called Under Rug Swept? That’s like Dylan Thomas! Wait, no, that’s Under Milk Wood.
Guy #2: I have officially fired you from talking.

–Starbucks, 8th Avenue & 15th Street

That Never Stopped the Beatles from Putting Out Albums

NYU guy: You saw Notorious? How was it?
NYU girl: I didn't even know I was going to a movie, I thought we were going to a concert.
NYU guy: He's dead, you know.
NYU girl: Well, now I know.

–Uptown 6 Train

Something Dimwitted This Way Comes

Guy: …so he digs stuff like Fahrenheit 451 and all–
Girl: “451”? Er, 9-11, you mean.

–Park Slope

Overheard by: Cap’n MidNite

Curtis, Do You Think We’re… Gay?

Man #1: That’s the second Korean movie that has ever made me cry.
Man #2: Oh, yeah. Lots of ’em do. I mean, if you see enough of them, a lot of them do.

–12th & University

Overheard by: James

Insert “Sucky Movie” Headline Here

Blond lady who lunches #1: What the fuck is it with the kids these days and their fucking vampires?
Blond lady who lunches #2: Fucking Twilight.

–Madison Avenue

Overheard by: LES girl trying not to laugh

Then What's the War on Polyester?

Tattooed man holding copy of Peaceful Warrior: What about this? I think I'd like this.
Girlfriend: Why?
Tattooed man: It's about a big war or something.
Girlfriend (reading back of DVD): No, no. It's about a warrior.
Tattooed man: Yeah, so there has to be a war if there's a warrior.
Girlfriend: I don't think it's about a real war, it says something here about gymnastics.
Tattooed man: Gymnastics? That's like a faggot war or something.

–Hollywood Video, Staten Island

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