Drunk girl, screaming at Adam Duritz: I want you in my vagina!
Friend: Would you stop?! Like 400 people hate you right now!
Drunk girl: I don’t care, they didn’t fuck him!
Friend: Actually… Like 200 of them probably did…
–Counting Crows Concert
Overheard by: Hating her
Asian girl: She said she let him do her in the butt for drugs!
Asian guy: That’s weird because she’s so conservative.
–E 9th St
McSuit #1: Do you wanna head to the subway?
McSuit #2: You mean Subway, like the restaurant?
McSuit #1: No, I mean subway, like the fuckin’ subway.
–7th & Bowery
Hobo: Yo, can I get a cigarette? [Girl hands him one.] Can I get a light? Don’t worry, I’m not going to mug you — it’s too cold for that shit.
–90th & 1st
Lady: Excuse me, do you sell phone cards to Africa?
Cashier: Let me check. (looks around)
Guy at the beer cooler: Man, they ain't got no phones in Africa!
–Convienance Store, 45th & 8th
Overheard by: Joe
Girl #1: You want a hot dog?
Girl #2: Sure. What kinds do they have?
Girl #1, looking confused: What do you mean?
Girl #2: I want one with ketchup.
–Nathan's Restaurant
Overheard by: Eva
Woman: Hola! Una wheatgrass con ginger… Por favor!
Latina girl behind counter: Excuse me? You wanted what, exactly?
Woman: Ummm… A wheatgrass shot with ginger?
Girl: You do realize we don’t have that, don’t you?
–Juicy Lucy’s, Avenue A
Overheard by: JKS
Teen girl to friend: We should, like, totally go out after this.
Friend: But we're not slutty enough to go to a bar.
Teen girl: Ooh! How about a sushi restaurant?
–LIRR
Overheard by: slut for sushi
Boy to girl: Does it look like my ass is eating my pants?
–Brooklyn Tech
Overheard by: Julie
Eight-year old girl: It’s not me, it’s the pants! It’s the pants!
–81st & Roosevelt Ave
Overheard by: Jobee
Woman on cell: No. No. Absolutely not. Look, would you please put some pants on?
–8th & Broadway
Cop to his cop friends: My buns don’t look good in these pants. But hey, what can you do? It’s part of the uniform.
–Times Square Shuttle Station
Overheard by: Heather
Girl on cell: Do you have to shit? Oh… So go in your pants!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Shira
Incredulous thug to friend: You drop your pants to hop the train?
–W. Houston & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Jon A.
Frazzled mother to young child: Hurry. Hurry. Look, the monster is going to get you if you don't walk faster!
–Queens Mall
Mother to small child: If you eat your two pieces of chicken, I'll give you a raisin.
–College Point Shopping Center
Overheard by: Yesenia
Mom speaking to son: Sweetie, do I look like a eggbeater?
–Waterside Plaza
Woman on bus to child with large hearing aid: Sit down properly! Are you listening to me?
–M23 Bus
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Mother to whiny toddler: I can't listen to you anymore! I fear for both of us.
–15th St & University Place
Overheard by: Sarah M.
