Little girl: Mom, can I have some water?
Mom: Girl, don’t make me open my purse, you don’t know what’ll come out.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Michael
Little girl: Mom, can I have some water?
Mom: Girl, don’t make me open my purse, you don’t know what’ll come out.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Michael
Dad: My Bloody Valentine in 3-d…violence and naked women.
Nine-year-old son: Yeah, that's the only reason you want to see that movie.
–Kafuman Studio Movie Theater, Astoria
Little tourist boy: Mommy! Look, that lady is a Nazi!
Frazzled tourist mom: What? Oh… Honey, that nice lady is hailing a cab, not Hitler.
–Bowery
Woman to ten-year-old daughter: And then we'll go to the cemetery to visit nana.
Four-year-old son: Can I come to the cemetery, too?!
Woman: No.
Four-year-old son, defiantly: Well, you're not going to see nana anyway. You're just going to see her grave!
–59th St & Lexington
Overheard by: Rachel C.
Girl #1: He, he, he, just brrroke uuup with meee!
Girl #2: How, isn't he in Alaska?
Girl #1: No! Well, what do you mean? I was talking to my dad, the phone just broke up. I wasn't talking about him, I was talking about my dad!
(girls #1 and 2 laugh)
–Central Park
Overheard by: Anna
Mom: Hold my hand! It’s too crowded for you to let go of my hand!
Dad: He think he grown, but he ain’t grown yet.
Mom: I know, waking up all early in the morning.
Dad: Next time he does that, thinkin’ he’s all grown, tell him to change his own shitty Pamper.
–Staten Island Ferry
Overheard by: J. Noelle
Ghetto mama: Gimme some of yo’ Skittles, boy.
Little boy: No, they be my Skittles.
Ghetto papa: Boy, you best to give yo’ mama some Skittles or yo’ ass is nevah gonna taste that rainbow again.
–1 train
Old White man: I have never seen a mother treat a child in such a way.
Latina mother: Dude. You don’t even want to fuck around with a crazy bitch from the Bronx.
–4/5 train
Overheard by: Taryn
Older gentleman on phone: I was just calling to ask if you wanted to make love to my nice, long, Lebanese penis again tonight. (pause) Yes, yes, 10 works for me.
–45th & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Morgan
Mother, hissing to girl dancing exuberantly: You stop that! Stop it! Boys will try to sex you! Stop!
–6 Train Station
Girl on cell, yelling: He got soft inside me! That's, like, the worst insult ever!
–23rd & 9th
Girl on cell: Come over to the 7-Eleven anytime. I will fuck you!
–Washington Square West
Overheard by: David Fishkind
Brunching woman to friends: We lived in Buffalo! We could have had sex on the sidewalk, but it was four years before we were engaged!
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Alexandra
Madison Square Garden worker: Sir… Sir! Sir, where the hell do you think you're going?
Man, with five-year-old kid: I'm gettin' in the line for the bathroom.
Madison Square Garden worker: Sir, it looks to me like you're trying to get into the ladies bathroom.
Man: But I got a kid!
Madison Square Garden worker: Did you give birth to your kid?
Man: No!
Madison Square Garden worker: Then it looks to me like you're in the wrong fuckin line.
–Madison Square Garden
