Boys Don't Wednesday One-Liner

Mom to small children: Well, we all have parts. And these parts talk to our bodies and tell us we are a boy or a girl. And sometimes these parts get confused.

–Washington Square East

20-something girl to male friend: You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl! You're a dirty girl!

–N Train

Overheard by: TR

Mother to gender-transitioning son, questioning plans for surgery: Are you a boy trapped in a girl's body? I'm getting a face lift, and it's because I'm a young person trapped in an old person's body.

–39th & 9th

Man in yellow and green track suit and aviator sunglasses: Nah, I can't go. That's when I'm having my breast reduction.

–Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Ems

Teenage boy: I don't wanna be on that block, son! I know too many trannies on that block!

–Bedford & Grove

Overheard by: How many is too many?

Guy on cell, leaving message: Hello, Dave. This is your mother.

–Tisch School of the Arts

Overheard by: Bruce Lee

Teen boy: Fear me, I have vaginitis!

–Staten Island Ferry

Overheard by: Jingles

Posted on July 14, 2015
Age/Aging, All Wednesday One-Liners, College, Families, Ferry, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Gender issues, Girls, Guys, Insults, Kids, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Moms, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Parents, Parks, Physical appearance, Private Parts, Queer guys, Questions, Rack, Sexuality, Staten Island Ferry, Surgery, Teens, Trannies, Vagina, Washington Square Park, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, West Village, Wishes & desires

Is There a Right Answer to This?

Gay man: Have you ever smelled your ass, after you buttfuck?

–18th & 6th

Overheard by: Dana

Posted on July 12, 2015
Asshole, Backdoor, Body Parts, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Manhattan, People, Places, Private Parts, Queer guys, Queers, Scents of the City, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Topics

Unless You're Determined to Raise a Crappy Person

Pregnant lady: My tummy hurts, it's either gas or the baby.
Husband: How can you tell the difference?
Pregnant lady: By which exit is used.

–Katz Deli

Overheard by: M. McOrmick

Posted on July 9, 2015
Body Parts, Couples, Delis, Farting & Burping, Health and Hygiene, Preggers, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Private Parts

We Are Talking About Yoga, Right?

Girl to guy friend: Ohmigod, I accidentally walked in on my mom while she was doing it last night!
Guy: Super nasty. I'd hate to see that.
Girl: Actually, mom was holding it down. I think I could learn some moves from her.
Guy: What? How long did you watch?
Girl: It was nothing, like ten minutes.

–33rd St & Lexington

Overheard by: tinydancer

Posted on July 1, 2015
Family Ties, Murray Hill and Gramercy, Parents, Private Parts, Should've Used a Condom, Teens

Especially Those With Gynecomastia

White Guy: White people can’t dance.
White Girl: I’m white and I can dance.
White Guy: Yeah, but you have tits. Anyone with tits looks good when they dance.

–Happy Ending, Chinatown

Posted on June 29, 2015
Bars & Clubs, Chinatown, Manhattan, People, Places, Private Parts, Rack, Venues, White People

But If I Find One Hair, It’s Going in the Trash

Teen girl #1: No, I don’t think I’ll be buying a chocolate vagina.
Teen girl #2: Why not?! It tastes like chocolate but looks like a vagina!
Teen girl #1: Okay… maybe.

–45th & Broadway

Posted on June 19, 2015
Business and Commerce, Food, Junk Food & Fast Food, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Private Parts, Teens, Vagina

Those Were Uggs, You Tards

Guy #1: The girl with the tattoo on her breast.
Guy #2: Oh yeah, yeah. She got a huge booty. That shit be a jigglypuff.
Guy #1: Yeah, for real. I just wanna grab that shit.
Guy #2: Yeah, but she got hairy legs.
Guy #1: You seen ’em?
Guy #2: Hell yeah, she showed me.
Guy #1: But, you know, it’s winter. Girls be gettin’ sloppy in wintertime.
Guy #2: I don’t care, man. That shit’s atrocious.

–4 train