Girl #1: Ooh, look at that cool Jesus jacket.
Girl #2: That’s not Jesus, that’s Rick James.
–Broadway & Spring
Overheard by: margie
Girl #1: Ooh, look at that cool Jesus jacket.
Girl #2: That’s not Jesus, that’s Rick James.
–Broadway & Spring
Overheard by: margie
Bus driver #1: Hey, Frank!
Bus driver #2: WHAT?
Bus driver #1: Dude, stop yelling at me. I’m right next to you.
Bus driver #2: It’s my bus driver voice.
Bus driver #1: You need to learn when the right time is to use the bus driver voice.
Bus driver #2: Jeez, sorry.
–Kew Garden Rd, Queens
Overheard by: Collegiate Cutie
Chick #1: And I was like “Whaaaat?” Yo! Uh-huh.
Chick #2: I'm sayin'!
Chick #1: That shit was like…
Chick #2: Mmm-hmmm.
Chick #1: You know what I'm talking about.
–8th St b/w 5th & University
Overheard by: manhattman
Man in bathroom stall to old Chinese man persistently knocking on his door: Look, I only got in here just now. Stop knocking! I'm gonna learn Chinese just to tell you how it is.
Man using urinal: Don't be hatin'.
Man in bathroom stall: Don't be stupid!
–Columbus Park
Stoner dude #1: Which way is it?
Stoner dude #2: Hold on. Hold on! I need to grapple with the political implications of this pickle.
–Canal & Bowery
European male model #1: You know, he’s albino.
European male model #2: Albino?
European male model #1: Albino? Albeeno?
European male model #2: Oh, albeeno, I know what that is. Red eyes.
American male model #1: What the fuck? Blue eyes, man.
European male model #2: No, red. They don’t have enough…
European male model #1: Ferment.
European male model #2: Yeah, not enough fermentation in their eyes. It’s biology… That is biology.
–Q Train
Overheard by: Julie
Customer: How much are money orders here?
Teller: Well, I see that you are over the age of fifty so it’ll be free for you.
Customer: Ok, so can I have a money order for $260?
Teller: Ok, so do you want to pay that in cash or withdraw from your account?
Customer: Excuse me?
Teller: How do you want to provide the funds for the money order?
Customer: I thought you said it was free.
Teller: There is no fee for the money order but you still need to provide the funds for it.
Customer: Oh, well you should have made that clear.
Teller: Wow, I’m sorry.
–Commerce Bank, Jackson Heights
Overheard by: E
Teen girl #1: You shouldn’t chew gum; it makes you stupider.
Teen girl #2: Oh yeah?
Teen girl #1: Yeah, I heard that somewhere.
Teen girl #2: Well, I heard somewhere that you’re an idiot. No, wait, that was right here.
–Stuyvesant High School, Chambers Street
Cop #1: It smells like bacon.
Cop #2: Sorry.
–W 47th St
FDNY lieutenant to EMTs: Hey, get this! Some guy just called 911 because some guy looked scary!
–34th & 10th
Overheard by: guy in back of ambulance
Gay guy to another: I'm terrified of successful women!
–23rd & Park Ave
Overheard by: Moy
(guy with drums finishes a performance in the train)
Guy with drums: Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for listening. Help a brother out and donate some money if you enjoyed this performance. (lady in front of him looks scared)
Please donate and if you don't know what to do or are scared, smile and nod. Everything will be okay.
–E Train
Overheard by: Sleepy
Crazy bag lady to high school boy: I ain't scared of you. I'll beat you with a crowbar. Cuz I gotta crowbar in my pussy and it's way up there!
–B54 Bus
Suit on cell: And I was scared, right? Because her legs were open in the cemetery.
–Gramercy Park
