Ditzy teen: Hey, is the pope Jewish?
Boyfriend: Ummm, no — why the hell would you think that?
Ditzy teen: Well, he wears that little Jewish thing on his head.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Olivia
Ditzy teen: Hey, is the pope Jewish?
Boyfriend: Ummm, no — why the hell would you think that?
Ditzy teen: Well, he wears that little Jewish thing on his head.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Olivia
Cali boy #1: Duuude, it’s like Grand fuckin’ Central in here, man.
Cali boy #2: Yeah, it’s hella crazy. Let’s get outta here.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Rebecca
Rich girl #1: It was so ANNOYING! I mean, boom, eighty bucks!
Rich girl #2: I hate losing money! Where were you?
Rich girl #1: Shopping.
Rich girl #2: I hate when that happens.
–Starbucks, 59th & Columbus
Chinese coworker: Hey, you’re wearing makeup today!
Jewish coworker: Yeah, I had a little extra time this morning.
Chinese coworker: But I thought Jewish people couldn’t wear makeup?
Jewish coworker: Huh!?
–Office Building, 26th & 11th
Guy: Thanks, ma’am.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “ma’am?”? Do I look like a ma’am? I don’t look that old, do I?
Guy: No, no; “ma’am” is a sign of respect, not age.
Teenage cashier: Okay, then.
Guy: Uh, thanks, hot mama.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “hot mama”?
–Gourmet Garage, Broadway
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
(attractive girls are sitting to the right)
Guy #1: Yo, look at 3 o'clock.
Guy #2: Nah, dude what are you taking about… It is 1:30.
Guy #1: I mean the 3 o'clock direction!
Guy #2: Oh!… Wait, the hour hand or the minute hand?
–Baruch College, 25th St
Overheard by: Richard Parker
Mother: So, if you could be any animal, which do you think would represent you the best? I think a horse fits you.
Daughter: What? A horse? No. I want to be a unicorn.
Mother: You’re mentally ill.
–Balthazar, Spring & Crosby
Overheard by: apples
Girl #1: Ugh, this is made in China, everything is made in China these days.
Girl #2: Yeah, in China they eat puppies.
–Target, Queens
Hobo: Look at this, does this look fake?
Guy: What did you do, print it?
Hobo: Yeah! You think it looks fake?
Guy: Yes.
Hobo: Well it ain’t!
–R train
Overheard by: SkunkEye
