White boy #1: I only like to watch girl-on-girl.
White boy #2: What? You don’t like dick in your porn? That’s fucking gay.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Jesse
White boy #1: I only like to watch girl-on-girl.
White boy #2: What? You don’t like dick in your porn? That’s fucking gay.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Jesse
Black bagger: I got to get me a soos. Man, I need a soos. Honey, you know where I could get me one?
Black woman paying for groceries: No.
Black bagger: Oh, hey I bet this guy knows. Hey guy! You! Do you know where I could find me a massage therapist?
White guy in line: I have no idea.
Black bagger: Oh, damn; I thought you’d know.
–Supermarket, Nostrand Ave, Stuyvesant Town
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
White girlfriend: You’ve got something on your face.
Black boyfriend: It’s probably your hatred.
–Barnes & Noble, 8th Street
Overheard by: m-Co
Guy to security guard: We're not fucking tourists, man, we're just trying to get back to our home in Jersey.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Confabulation Nation
Metrosexual guy: There are two kinds of people I will never, ever, date. One are people who are culturally ignorant. The second is people from New Jersey.
–45th & 5th
Overheard by: Mr. Pink
Proper British woman to loud drunk guy: Go back to Jersey!
–BB King Concert, Christ United Church
Overheard by: bb
Uptight 40-something white guy: I can't wait to get safely back in New Jersey!
–A Train
Overheard by: JoshBob
White girl, yelling to black friend: Heather! Come to the back of the bus and sit with me!
Heather: I ain't no Rosa Parks!
–Bus, Brooklyn
Latina: Oh my god! This girl had a busted, Mexican-looking face with just fat everywhere. You throw her in the water, that bitch will float!
White friend: Uhhh, humans float anyway.
Latina: Whatever, she was fat.
–Richmond Hill, Queens
Jamaican man, talking to himself: At the next stop I'm going to be white with blue eyes and blond hair.
Trashy, red-lipsticked middle-aged white woman with blue eyes and blonde hair: I can tell you from experience it's not all that.
–Downtown N Train
Overheard by: veronica
10-year-old tourist kid: Mom, is Brooklyn famous for its graffiti?
–Coney Island-bound D train
Overheard by: BB
White guy, pointing: Over there in Brooklyn three-year-olds just, like, walk around!
–Delancey & Essex
Overheard by: Red Hair
Guy walking through bar: What’s with Brooklyn and beards?
–Union Hall, Park Slope
Overheard by: jasonjason
Guy: Brooklyn is the middle borough in terms of goodness.
–Kosher Delight
Thugette to double decker tour bus: Brooklyn! Brooklyn! You’re taking a tour of Brooklyn! I just got out of jail!
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Staying on the bus….
White female Columbia student (singing in the rain): Let the rain fall down and wake my dreams.
Black heavy male stranger: Let it wash away my sanity.
–114th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: 'cause I wanna feel the thunder I wanna scream
Asian girl: I was going down the stairs just now, and this girl was getting seriously upset over how horrible she looks today. Then the boy she was with went all, ‘Oh my god, stop it!’ and asked me, ‘Doesn’t she look good today?’
White girl: And then?
Asian girl: I told him she looks lovely, and came here.
White girl: Oh.
Asian girl: But goddammit, I wanted to slap her upside the face! I mean, don’t go around crying over how ugly you look when you’re obviously skinny and gorgeous — that just makes you a bitch!
White girl: Mmm-hm. Seriously.
–Bronx Science
