Old Russian man (loudly): I like big tutus!
Bank teller: Yes, okay.
Old Russian man: Like my wife!
–Apple Bank, 86th St
Overheard by: hatia
Old Russian man (loudly): I like big tutus!
Bank teller: Yes, okay.
Old Russian man: Like my wife!
–Apple Bank, 86th St
Overheard by: hatia
Gay guy: Hey look, the Union Square sign is broken. It says “Squarf.” “Squarf” sounds like a verb.
Female friend: I got squarfed until I bled last night.
–Union Square
Overheard by: David
Student: Yeah, someone who plays the cello is a cellist, someone who makes art is an artist, and someone who writes poetry is a poist.
–Hunter College High School
Heavily accented Asian cashier to heavily accented Asian coworker: What!? Speaka English, por favor.
–J2 Deli, W 18th St
Overheard by: nick m
Bimbo looking at scoreboard: I think the "e" stands for "exqualifications" You know, for when a player is "exqualified".
–Yankees Stadium
Lady: I know what I am, he ain't gonna labelize me.
–Washington Square Park
Real estate agent: And all the doormen and service staff are Easter European.
–Park Avenue
Overheard by: Looking for an apartment
Ghetto college girl: I'll talk to you later, I gots to get my learn on, girl.
–Brooklyn College
Overheard by: Corey
Trendy girl: I mean, I like her as a person, I just don’t like what she does with my hair.
–Max, Ave. B
Guy on cell: Listen man, he’s Trump. We can put his name on anything and they’ll buy it. Put his fucking face on a fucking bottle of water and they’ll fucking buy it!
–28th St. and Park Avenue
Overheard by: G Varod
Woman on cell: There’s only one word for this party. And it is “epic.”
–CPW and 110th St.
Film student girl #1: How was it?
Film student girl #2: Dunno. He definitely shouted out “Hasselblad.”
–Bobst Library, Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Bruce Lee
Foreigner, about hot chick passerby: I would like to date her.
Passerby: I think you mean rape her.
–558 Driggs Ave, Brooklyn
Ghetto girl: There is no I in ‘team.’
Ghetto boy: There is also no I in ‘gangbang.’
–Astoria
Overheard by: Erik
Cashier to woman buying sanitary napkins: Do you want these double-bagged?
Woman buying sanitary napkins: What's that supposed to mean?
–Pharmacy, Flatbush
Overheard by: taylor
Woman #1: Kate and I saw a snake walking down State Street yesterday!
Man: What?
Woman #2: Wait… walking?
–Central Park
Overheard by: A snake? Really?
