Crazy lady: Where are we?
Stranger: New York City.
Crazy lady: Should I call 911?
–Amtrak
Overheard by: tj
Crazy lady: Where are we?
Stranger: New York City.
Crazy lady: Should I call 911?
–Amtrak
Overheard by: tj
Tourist: How do you know which ones are going where?
New Yorker: Which ones? Well, they have a 4, 5, or 6 number on them, and they’re all going uptown.
Tourist: But we’re going to 68th street, and they’re not all going there. How do you know which ones are making which stops?
New Yorker: Oh, well…You just kind of know.
Tourist: Oh. Well, we’re just gonna follow you.
New Yorker: Okay.
–4/5/6 station, 59th St
Overheard by: trish
Mom: We gotta figure out where the hell we’re going.
Child: Maybe you should ask a police officer or a security guard.
Mom: I’m not asking them anything. They don’t know shit. Learn that in life: never ask anyone anything ’cause they don’t know nothing.
–33rd & 7th
11-year-old girl: Yo mamma's broke cuz she spend all her money on rhinestones and cigarttes!
–Riverside Branch Library
Overheard by: always listening
Polite lady: Go straight down that way and cut through the projects–don't worry, they're mixed income–and you'll see it when you come out on A.
–1st Ave & 5th St.
Overheard by: Mrqs
Old lady waiting for the bathroom: How long do people stay in toilets? Jesus! It's a public toilet! There are all these people from the streets that come in, and they always pee on the floor. Well, that's what happens when you're poor.
–NY Public Library
Overheard by: Avery
Homegirl to friend: So she was like "oh, my name's Diamond. And this is my sister, her name's Ruby. Our daddy named us after stuff he can't afford." I was like, shit, if that was the case, my daddy woulda call us "lights" and "gas."
–Prospect Park
Nerdish teen: What the hell was a warlock doing in a dungeon when he had no money?
–C Train
Overheard by: Andrew
Chinese-Canadian girl: Where are we going next?
Mom: Chinatown.
Girl: I thought Chinatown was in Canada…?
–Empire State Building
Angry rider after missing a stop: Why can’t you just pull over? You was only like this far away?
Bus driver: I can only stop at designated stops, I’m sorry.
Angry rider: You could have stopped, you just wanted to be a dick.
Bus driver: Yeah, you would know — you suck enough of it.
–BX9 bus
Overheard by: Don’t know much about it
Man on cell: I’m at the bad Duane Reade right now… Yeah, the one on 14th street…I know that’s the good one, but it’s in danger zone.
–Duane Reade, 14th & 3rd
Overheard by: not in danger zone
Girl on cell: I’m in like the Middle East somewhere… Where are you?
–56th & 7th Ave
Overheard by: dnuggets
Hipster on cell: No, I swear to god I am not in Montreal!
–Outside Alligator Lounge, Williamsburg
Overheard by: miles
Lady yelling into pay phone, by platform: I’m in Yonkers! I’m right by the train!
–W 242 & Broadway, Bronx
Overheard by: Krisztina
Harried guy in suit on his cell: Yeah well, I’m at the Port Authority…I hear this is where the buses leave from.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: JoBell
Screaming man on pay phone: Yo -I told yo ass to meet me on 33rd and 5th. I be standin’ here and you ain’t here. [Pause.] What the fuck do you mean!? I be on da corner waiting for yo ass for the past fifty minutes. I only get an hour for lunch. Now you gone and messed up my day cuz yo ass ain’t show up. [Pauses, speaks more calmly.] I’m on da corner of 33rd and 5th. [Screaming again.] Don’t tell me yo ain’t see me! I’m standing right here!
–35th & Madison
Bike guy #1: ‘Scuse me, do you know how to get to the West Side?
Man: It’s over there. Where are you going?
Bike guy #2: Do you know the clubs?
Man: Not really.
Bike guy #1: Crobar?
Man: No. Where is it?
Bike guy #1: I think 138th Street.
Man: That would be about 150 blocks up thataway.
–City Hall Park
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Well-dressed British lady: Driver, what's the next stop?
Bus driver: I'm not letting you off until you pay your fare. Don't ask me again.
–M31 Bus
Overheard by: Nora
Conductor: Borough Hall. Next stop, Heaven…excuse me, Nevins.
Woman: Um, should I get off here?
–5 train
Overheard by: James
