Eastern European tourist chick, looking at Empire State Building: What is that?
New York teenage girl, in perfect seriousness: I have no idea.
–Outside Empire State Building
Overheard by: Sapodilla
Eastern European tourist chick, looking at Empire State Building: What is that?
New York teenage girl, in perfect seriousness: I have no idea.
–Outside Empire State Building
Overheard by: Sapodilla
Middle aged dude #1: My son has a black roommate, by choice. French black, but black just the same.
Middle aged dude #2: (silence)
Middle aged dude #1: He says the Asians are the funniest. He's in a band with some Chinese guys.
–Starbucks, Union Square
Overheard by: Tall Skim Latte
Brit husband: I can’t believe this isn’t air conditioned.
Brit wife: Well, this isn’t London…just pretend it is a sauna.
Brit husband: I can’t. It smells like piss and sweat, not cedar.
–1 train
Greek male #1: Your mother is upset! She is very mad about this!
Greek male #2: She is mad at me?
Greek male #1: Yes! Because you did not take care of the job.
Greek male #2: I did! I used the black knife with the big blade. The good one.
Greek male #1: Oh, very good.
Greek male #2: You are upset. I can see it in your eyes.
Greek male #1: No, I just had a couple of beers.
–Crescent & Ditmars, Astoria
Overheard by: Natalie
Barista: Sir, you can pay for the juice over there.
Middle-aged Brit: But I bought it.
Barista: No you didn’t.
Middle-aged Brit: Yes, I did — at another place.
Barista: Yeah, oookay [rolls eyes].
Middle-aged Brit: I really did.
Barista: Yeah, oookay.
Middle-aged Brit: What the fuck is your problem?
Barista: Well, you just stole juice, and you’re being an ass, so you can leave now.
Middle-aged Brit: Excuse–
Old lady Brit: –Alexander, just stop talking! He could shoot you!
–Starbucks, Fashion District
Overheard by: only in new york
Foreign girl #1 to lesbian entering ladies' room: I'm sorry, this is a ladies' room.
Lesbian: I'm a woman.
Foreign girl #1: Oh my god, I'm so sorry! That's the worst thing I've ever done!
Foreign girl #2, coming out of stall: Wait, no. You're so not a woman!
Lesbian: You wanna see the ta-tas?
–Sidewalk Bar, 6th & Ave A
Girl: How old is that guy?
Guy: Who, Bono? 40, 45.
Girl: Oh, and where are they from, England?
–7 train
Overheard by: Jack Kennedy
Very large man, pointing at a McDonald’s: Where were you last night at 3 a.m. when I was craving you?
–49th & 9th
Man wearing an “I Heart My Heart” shirt, to guy eating fast food: You’re just aching for that heart attack, aren’t you?
–46th & Broadway
Angry burger flipper: Making Big Macs is complex. It’s 2 all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun…And then it gets even more confusing, ’cause people all have their special requests, like no special sauce. And that just throws shit off. The Whopper is so easy. It don’t have shit on us.
–M11 bus
Asian girl, screaming into cell: I said, “Quiero Taco Bell!”
–33rd & Broadway
Overheard by: Kelsey
Foreign tourist to cabbie: How much to go to K…F…C?
–Broadway between 38th & 39th
Overheard by: Gregorio
Old Russian man approaches teen girl and says something in Russian.
Teen girl: What?
Russian man: You don’t speak Russian?
Teen girl: No.
Russian man: Oh, well you want job?
Teen girl: No.
Russian man walks away.
Girl’s mom: I think he wanted to hire you for an escort service.
–Sheepshead Bay train station, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Waiting for the bus
Russian girl: Yo, this tip is crooked.
Asian nail tech: It not crooked, you Russian girls always complaining.
Russian girl: Stupid gook!
Asian nail tech: Oh, at least you get slur right! Everyone always “Chink! Chink!” I'm fucking Korean!
–Asian Nail Salon, 86th St
