Girl #1: He doesn't even love you.
Girl #2: Yeah, but I'm the only one who can get him to cheat on his wife!
–Webster Hall
Girl #1: He doesn't even love you.
Girl #2: Yeah, but I'm the only one who can get him to cheat on his wife!
–Webster Hall
Girlfriend: This guy told me that a girl told you it would be worth your while to cheat on me!
Boyfriend: First of all, I didn’t tell her I had a girlfriend…
–F train
Woman #1: I wish he would do me like that more often.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: So I wouldn’t have to cheat on him anymore.
–40th & Park
Angry construction worker to befuddled construction worker: Don't look at me like that! Don't say that to me! Go home and fuck my wife, asshole!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Jumana
Construction working to another: Man, I need to get me a bi girlfriend. She'd be lovin' me, and I'd be lovin' her friends.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Rich R.
Construction worker, singing: If there's a skeeter on your Peter/whack it off! (claps twice)
–Waverly Place & 5th Ave
Overheard by: steph
Tough construction worker, unloading van: Yo, I was up til like 2 am watchin' Scooby Doo Where Are You!
–Humboldt & Withers
Overheard by: francesca
Construction worker, staring up at construction skyscraper: It's all twisted. It's going to come down.
–Williams St
Overheard by: Sonya
Guy: You’re married, right?
Woman: Yes.
Guy: I’m too black and ugly for you anyways, right?
–Park Avenue
Overheard by: Skid
College girl #1: I found out Mike’s cheating on me. I’m, like, totally devastated.
College girl #2: Ugh. What an asshole. How’d you find out?
College girl #1: Joe told me last week after we hooked up.
College girl #2: Ugh… Mike is such a jerk…
–Macy’s
Overheard by: Merlyn
Chonga #1: I never said I was goin out wit him, we just went places together. I wouldn't say I was goin out wit a married man…
Chonga #2: Mmmm-hmmm.
Chonga #1: At least I not da only ho!
–J Train
Skinny Spanish girl: That nigga was saying how he had me moaning and screaming, but I was like, "nigga, I'm just loud–that doesn't mean you're good!"
–Ft. Hamilton Parkway, Brooklyn
Overheard by: also loud
Ghetto chick to friend: Yo…in my country, it's illegal to not please your woman. You gotta fuck her till she begs you to stop.
–116th & 1st
Overheard by: DonnaRae
Man on phone: Yeah…I just fingerblasted her for like an hour. No big deal.
–E 4th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: intern2
Mom to teenage son: And I was like "sure, have sex in my bed, it never sees any."
–Mercer & W 3rd
Girl on cell: Oh no, he's back fucking his secretary now, so I'm like, completely free!
–East Village
20-something on cell, after loud graphic sex tale: And don't you be telling anyone! I don't like strangers knowing my business.
–Express Bus to Brooklyn
Chick on cell: It was amazing! We spent the entire night together. We really connected. It just doesn’t seem like his wife knows him at all… Well, okay, Dad, gotta run. Love you, too.
–Smith & Baltic, Brooklyn
JAP with coldsore: I can’t date Jewish guys anymore. I mean, I really like Jewish guys, but I can’t stand them. Just because I’m dating someone, it doesn’t mean I can’t have sex with someone else!
–Murray Hill Diner
Chick: I thought it was bad being cheated on with an underage albino, but at least she wasn’t a fat tranny.
–42nd St
Girl on cell: I really had to talk about it, and I knew I couldn’t leave anything about our relationship on his answering machine! His wife listens to that! And his kids!
–67th & Broadway
Hipster chick: The married one I was having an affair with — if he MySpaced me, it’d be rude not to MySpace his wife, right?
–Mott & Prince
Girl: …The only time I was hanging out with girls was when I was cheatin’, ’cause I needed an escape goat.
–R train
Overheard by: Clara
