Male suit: So, you’re a literary agent? That’s so cool. How’s it going?
Lady suit: I just sold my first book! And the movie rights were optioned the same day!
Male suit: Totally exciting. What’s the book about?
Lady suit: Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t actually read it.
Male suit: That’s cool. I didn’t really read much until I started college.
–A train
Overheard by: Max Perkins Is Rolling in His Grave
Hip Indian chick #1: We should totally go to Raj's party tomorrow night.
Hip Indian chick #2: Oh my god, we totally should! Except it's in Brooklyn. Like, how would we even get there? Are there like, bridges or something?
Hip Indian chick #1: You're kidding, right?
Hip Indian chick #2, laughing: Wow! I am so one of those people who are like total geniuses but always forget like, really basic stuff.
Hip Indian chick #1: Umm, yeah. Totally.
–M14D Bus
Overheard by: Cody
Guy from restaurant to hobo: Hey, do you want something to drink?
Hobo: Sure, what do you have?
Guy from restaurant: Pepsi, Coke, Sprite…
Hobo: Anything diet?
–75th & Broadway
Overheard by: uneditedtales
Hipster girl to friends: Oh my god, how lol are we right now?
Friend: Oh my god, so lol!
–20th & 8th, New School Dorm
Six-year-old boy with SpongeBob toyboy: SpongeBob.
Nanny: SpongeBob?! You ain’t bringin SpongeBob in my house! What is it, anyway? A slice o’ cheese?
–L train, Bedford
Overheard by: jake
Chick #1: Eeeeeew, I hate this show!
Chick #2: Me too! Hella boring.
Chick #1: I'm probably going to watch it.
Chick #2: Oh, me too.
–Times Square
Queer to friend: What sign are you?
Friend: Leo.
Queer: Oh, good. I decided that I am going to base what I think of people based on their astrological signs, and I hate Geminis. Like, if I adopt a baby and it's a Gemini I'm going to give it back!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: poor kid
Boy staring at dinosaur fossil: Dude, these animals died a lot.
Friend: Word.
–Museum of Natural History
Chris Noth: I talked to her for 10 minutes and figured out she was crazy.
–15th & Irving
Overheard by: Ameha Beyene
Young man: You're fat because you need to release. Look at me, that's why I'm slim and sexy. I beat off every day.
–Prospect Heights, Brooklyn
Salesgirl to salesgirl friend: I wanna thank you for taking the time to repeatedly hit me in my arm fat and make it jiggle.
–Henri Bendel
Overheard by: Stephan Dion
Professor to class of girls: You guys are all thin (looks around classroom and notices there are some fat girls) …mostly.
–Fashion Institute of Technology
Suit to another: All I'm trying to say is, she's not tall enough for her weight.
–Uptown 6 Train
Overheard by: ednapontellier
Black girl: Fat people can do splits because they have no bones.
–Pizza Place, St. Mark's Place
Five-year-old to very overweight man while waiting for Thanksgiving Day parade: Are you one of the balloons?
–Broadway & 50th St
Overheard by: Peter
