U.S. Geography

Cashier to girl showing her ID: No, we don't take this kind.
Manager to cashier: That's Tennessee–it's a state here.

–10th St & Ave B

Overheard by: Jeremy

Instructor: Those people outside are crazy, wearing big ol' leather boots in this kind of heat!
Student: Maybe they're from Texas?
Instructor: Nah, they looked pretty American to me.

–Beauty School, 35th & 8th

Overheard by: Bean

Teen girl to guy friend: What's your favorite football team?
Teen guy: Chiefs.
Teen girl: What state is that?
Teen guy: Red and yellow. Kansas City.
Teen girl: I don't know who that is.

–Q54 Bus

Kid looking at book: It looks like an alien world or something!
Mom: That's Seattle.
Dad: Well, it's on the west coast. It is alien.

–5th Ave, Brooklyn

Overheard by: super des

20-something redhead to friend, while texting: Wait… Maryland is down, and New York is up, right? I mean map-wise.
Friend: What the fuck?
20-something redhead, no longer texting: I had so much fun tonight. Can we do this again… lately?
Friend: Uhhh, do you mean “soon”?
20-something redhead: Yeah. Soon, lately, you know what I mean.

–Windsor Court, Murray Hill

Hobo with guitar, singing: My girl! That white girl is my girl! She may look like Brooke Shields but she's my girl! My girl! Oooh-ooh… Come on, everybody, sing with me, Puerto Ricans, too!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Tater

Drunk Puerto Rican father to man on train, yelling: The capital of Puerto Rico is the Bronx, bitch!

–6 Train

Overheard by: Alice Dalice

Guy, about some girls: I tried to tell them I was Puerto Rican, but they kept saying I was from Spain and called me a douchebag.

–East Village

Overheard by: NYCGlamDiva

Diner waitress: Just because he's Puerto Rican don't mean he's a cheetah.

–Park Slope

Overheard by: monkey girl

Asian girl to Hispanic guy: Come on! She's, like, the Puerto Rico of Asia!

–Jamba Juice, Mercer & Houston

Girl to cashier: Do you have any locations in North Carolina?
Cashier to girl: No, we only have locations on the East and West coasts.

–Store, Grand Central

Southern tourist #1: Where are you folks from?
Southern tourist #2: North Carolina.
Southern tourist #1: I'm from Virginia. I could tell you're from the South too because you're smiling. Northerners don't smile.

–45th St & Broadway

Overheard by: unsmiling new yorker

Guy #1 (reading newspaper): The fattest city in America: Virginia.
Guy #2: That's not a city.
Guy #1: Oh. I meant West Virginia.
Guy #2: That's still not a city.

–112th & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: It's not?

Confused American: I used to think Atlantic City was in Atlantic State.

–Downtown A Train

Overheard by: MBS

Drunk guy: I don't understand why people are giving Sarah Palin so much grief over that Russia thing. It really *is* pretty close to Alaska.

–W 66th St

Overheard by: Emily B.

Anti-McCain dude to another: Man, Sarah Palin is crazy. Yo, she's just crazy. Why did John McCain even pick her? She's not even an American citizen, she's Alaskan!

–The Bronx

Nervous white lady: Um, is the Broadway/Lafayette stop coming up soon?

–Uptown 1 Train

UPS guy to lost tourists: I'm not a GPS! I'm the UPS!

–Prince & Lafayette

Overheard by: dee