Oh, I Was All Up in Her Maki Roll.

Boy: I've never drinken anything like this before.
Girl: You mean “drank”.
Boy: I've never drunk anything like this.
Girl: No, I think it's “drank”.
Boy: When would I use “drunk”?
Girl: When you're drunk.

–Time-Warner Bulding, Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Barbara

Posted on March 11, 2010
Boys, Drinking & Drunk People, Girls, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Words

Wednesnogsday One-Liners

White male to group of friends: I thought she was really into me… Then I turned around and she was kissing Mary.

–Pace University

Girl to boyfriend kissing her hand: Are you kissing my hand or wiping your nose?

–Central Park

Young boy to friend: Wow, lesbians kissing! I've only seen that on the internet!

–Grand Central Station

Black man to two men and two women making out indiscriminately: I thought all y'alls was gay, but now y'alls kissin' each other. I don't know what to think.

–Splash Bar

Posted on March 3, 2010
All Wednesday One-Liners, Bars & Clubs, Black People, Body Parts, Boys, Central Park, College, Couples, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Grand Central, Guys, Internet, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, One-liners, Parks, Questions, Sexuality, Strangers, Train Station, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, White People

She's Hoping He'll Become Her Ventriloquist Dummy

Boy on cell on platform: So yeah, I'll be there soon…I'm at the… um… The um… The… what do you call it? I'm waiting for the umm, and I'm at the… (sighs) What do you call it?
Girl next to him, whispering loudly: Traaaaiiinnn statiiionnnnn!
Girl next to her, yelling: Platform, train station, waiting for a train!
(Boy walks away still on phone)

–Metro-North Rail

Overheard by: Gabriela

Posted on February 9, 2010
Boys, Girls, On Cell, Public Transportation, Questions, Stupidity, Trains Not Subway, Words

Murphy?

Boy #1: Get the bloody gums.
Boy #2: If you don't shut up about the bloody gums, I'm gonna give you bloody gums.

–Soho

Posted on February 2, 2010
Boys, Food, Soho, Threats

Or a Maid I Exploit. Same Difference.

Girl #1: So what did you say to your roommate?
Boy: I told her she was a fucking slut!
Girl #2: Isn't your roommate your girlfriend?
Boy: Sort of.

–Astor Place

Posted on December 29, 2009
Boys, Girls, Insults, Questions, Relationships, Union Square and East Village

Nice Wednesday One-Liners Finish Last

Man on cell: I need attractive girls with low self-esteem so I can tell them that I understand and then do horrible things to them. This is basic science.

–40th & 8th

Overheard by: 13Atlantic

Irate Wall Street guy standing in deli: Everything! Everything! I said "everything bagel," you fucking waste of life. (to other customers in line) He always does that!

–Beaver & William

Boy, watching Hannah Montana on screen: unless she's hanging from a rope, I can't be bothered.

–AMC 7, East Village

Overheard by: agreed

Female in red coat: It's, like, the Holocaust–get over it! I didn't even care about it when it first happened.

–Bobst Lobby, NYU

Overheard by: wow.