Lost barhopper: Hey, do you guys know where MacDougal Street is?
Hipster: Oh, I’m sorry dude. I’m just looking at the size of the fucking dog over there.
–Bleecker & Jones
Overheard by: KNation
Lost barhopper: Hey, do you guys know where MacDougal Street is?
Hipster: Oh, I’m sorry dude. I’m just looking at the size of the fucking dog over there.
–Bleecker & Jones
Overheard by: KNation
Polite Japanese tourist: Excuse me, please. Can you give direction to Empire State Building?
Angry old man: Hell, no. It’s not like you people needed goddam directions to get to Pearl Harbor.
–Broadway
Overheard by: He’s sorta right
Tourist: Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to MoMA from here?
Suit: Fuck you, what do I look…
Tourist, indignantly interrupting: No, fuck you, you motherfucking piece of shit. You don’t want to answer, you say “I don’t know”. All you New Yorkers are a bunch of cock-sucking assholes.
[Suit, stunned, gives directions.]Bystander to tourist: Where did you learn to do that?
Tourist: The Midwest.
–Outside the Guggenheim
Overheard by: Ehem.
Bossy, fanny-pack-wearing tourist lady: No, no… That map is wrong. We want Broadway and it’s … That way! [Points emphatically toward 8th avenue and storms away.]
–West 47th b/w Broadway & 8th Avenue
Overheard by: tinyfoo
Tourist, whispering to friend: There are a lot of Jewish people in here.
–B&H Photo
Tourist girl: Dad! Look! It’s Times Square! Walk this way.
–Rector St & Broadway
Overheard by: Jax
Tourist lady peering in shop window: Ooooh, calendars! Ooooh, t-shirts! Oh, we’re gonna have to come back here!
–48th & Broadway
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Tourist: Oh honey, look at this purse I bought! It’s a real coach bag and it was so cheap. I bought it on Canal street. You should see all of the Gucci, Prada, and Louis Vuitton they’ve got. I can’t believe you can get the real thing for so cheap.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Johanna
Tourist, in disbelief: People are buying shoes at 11 o’clock at night!
–33rd & Seventh
Overheard by: Gasp!
Bus driver, on loudspeaker: If your stop is Main street, please get off here.
Punk high school kid in back of bus: Fuckin’ asshole!
Bus driver, on loudspeaker: Yo mama.
–Q88 Bus
Overheard by: quite amused
[Heading towards the restaurant “Good”.]Gay guy #1: Where are we going again?
Gay guy #2: It’s “Good”.
Gay guy #1: What’s good?
Gay guy #2: The name of the restaurant we’re going to.
Gay guy #1: I asked you what it was.
Gay guy #3: Oh, we are so not doing this…
–The Village
[A small girl in scarf hands end of scarf to babysitter, who is on the phone. Babysitter absentmindedly holds scarf. Little girl pulls away.].
Babysitter: No, honey, we’re going to go this way [tugs in other direction].
Little girl: But I want to choke myself!
Babysitter, not really paying attention: No, no…
Little girl: But I want to choke myself! [pulls away harder].
Babysitter, still vague: No, honey, that’s bad…
–Grand Central Station
Tourist: Can you tell me where grand zero is?
Lady: You mean ground zero?
Tourist: Yes, I guess it is the same thing, okay…
Lady pointing straight ahead: Walk straight ahead. You see the big gap in the sky? There you go.
Tourist: Wait. I don’t see anything. What, its all gone already?
Lady: Are you retarded?
–Corner of Church & Reade
Passenger, to MTA workers: Excuse me, but does this train stop at 33rd street?
MTA worker #1: With a hope and a prayer.
MTA worker #2: Isn’t that right! Hahaha.
–6 Train
Overheard by: honeybudur
Dude #1: … Yo it was awesome man, she was so hot. It totally made the ski trip worth it.
Dude #2: Look at you, Governor Spitzer, gettin’ some outta town booty.
–Bryant Park
