And I Might Care If I Weren’t Too Busy Cutting Coke

Druggie chick in stall #1: Yo, Keesha, does your door have a lock on it?
Druggie chick in stall #2: No, they took them off so we can’t blow coke in here anymore.
Druggie chick in stall #1: What?! That has to be illegal… I’m, like, totally open to rape right now!

–Lower East Side

Overheard by: Allison

Posted on May 7, 2007
Cocaine, Druggies, Lower East Side, Stall Spies

Well, Maybe Just Seven

SUNY purchase student #1: My fucking head hurts.
SUNY purchase student #2 pulling out bag of white pills: Dude, take these pills. You’ll feel better.
SUNY purchase student #1: Uh… What are they?
SUNY purchase student #2: Uh, codeine I think? I don’t know. Yeah, I stole them from a kid at the party last night. He said he found them in a garbage can.
SUNY purchase student #1: Jesus, dude, no.

–Grand Central

Posted on March 3, 2007
Advice, Celebrations/Parties, Druggies, Drugs, Grand Central, Students, Talking/Convos, Thievery

If You’re Too Busy for That, You’re Too Busy for Life

Junkie lady: Excuse me, I need someone to help me. I’m trying to run for President, and I need someone — whaddyacallit — to book my limos and hotels for me and shit.
Librarian: Like a personal assistant?
Junkie lady: Yeah, that’s it! I’m running for President, and the minorities keep telling people that I’m crazy. I’m too busy to fuckin’ beat em with a metal baseball bat, you know, so I need a personal assistant.

–228 E 23rd St

Overheard by: Liberry Lady

Posted on February 20, 2007
Druggies, Murray Hill and Gramercy, President

I Thought We Were Sharing

Girl #1: I’m going to be on time for the train.
Girl #2: I’m on E!

–Northbound on 3rd Ave

Overheard by: mish

Posted on January 15, 2007
Druggies, Drugs, Girls, On the Subway, Public Transportation, Time

A Fellini Film

Hobo to unconscious friend: Yo man, let’s get some coke! I don’t be playing, let’s get some coke! [Two minutes later] Psssh, ain’t no such thing as a good kid. All them fucked up. Yo man, you look like Barry White. Anyone ever tell you that? [No response.] Stupid. [Reaches into his plastic bag and pulls out a clown mask which he puts over his face.]

–LIRR waiting area

Overheard by: pretending my train just arrived

Posted on November 26, 2006
About Celebrities, Cocaine, Compare/Contrast, Crazies, Druggies, Hobos, Offers and requests, Trains Not Subway, Weirdness

This Drug Dealer Is Obviously Lost Trying to Find NYU

Guy on bike: You look like you might need some help. [Hands student a business card] I mean, I can help you.
Student: What?
Guy on bike: Uh, ummm, I sell weed.

–Columbia University Campus

Overheard by: Mike Schwartz

Posted on November 20, 2006
Columbia (& Barnard), Druggies, Students, Weed

But Not for Long

Guy: Just look! Look behind us! There’s nobody! I just bought coke. Look, just give me 20 back and I’ll leave you alone all night. I swear. I don’t go to F.I.T. I go to West Point.

–8th Ave & 25th St