Wednesday One-Liners Make Your Eyes Water

Young man to another: And I was like, "No, man. A girl ain't supposed to smell like that, yo."

–Broadway & 37th St

Overheard by: glm

Loud Long Island woman to drunk friends: Yeah, I got really used to that smell once he came back from Nepal…

–LIRR

Guy to girl: I don't want to bring home a girl who smells like urine.

–36th & 5th

Hipster 20-something to preteen sister: This does not smell like Costa Rica! (pauses, as though to make sure) 14th Street in New York City does not smell like Costa Rica!

–14th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: David

Man complaining to friend: If she does that one more time… I mean, if that bitch comes home one more time with her breath smelling like some other guy's dick, I swear to fucking god… I'll leave her.

–Times Square

Overheard by: drekdude

Posted on October 28, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, BJs, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Compare/Contrast, Drunks, Friends, Girls, Guys, Hipsters, Infidelity, Men, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Nicknames & name calling, One-liners, Pee, Penis, Scents of the City, Sensory Experiences, Sisters, Street, The Village, Times Square, Trains Not Subway, Travel, Tweens, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women

Wednesday One-Liners Were “Working Late”

Girl on phone: I'm so sick of this! He keeps making excuses not to see me! I feel like I'm being used! (pause) No, really. (pause) I just can't deal anymore! We only hang out when he wants sex! (pause) And his excuses! Ohmigod! They are getting so lame. (pause) If it's not his work or boss, it's his nanny or his wife or his kid. (pause) I mean… what's his deal?

–Broadway & 20th St

Overheard by: Cali in NYC

Hispanic woman: And meanwhile the husband is in fucking Iraq, and she cheats on him with the UPS guy! What can brown do for you!

–7th Ave, Park Slope

Suit on cell: The love, the dirty sex, and the money… It's all going so well, and yet so sneaky. (hangs up, then dials another number) Mary, I think he's finding out… (pause) It's not my fault I am fucking my best friend's wife.

–79th St & Madison

Overheard by: Anna

Girl yapping on cell: It was amazing. I mean, I looked hot. (pause) Yes, I wore the naked dress. He took one look at me and had the "Uh-oh, can't control myself" expression. (pause) No, girl, his fucking wife is in town! I mean, whatever.

–51st St & Lexington Ave

Woman: He cheated… On JDate!

–26th & 8th

Posted on October 28, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, Anger Management, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Clothing, Dating, Friendship, Girls, Gripes, Infidelity, Insults, Internet, Jobs & Careers, Kids, Latinos, Lies, Love, Marriage, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Money & Class, On Cell, One-liners, Park Slope, Sex, Street, Suits, Upper East Side, War, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Wishes & desires, Women

You Have Chinese Teriyaki Chicken in Your Pants, Don't You?

Girl: I'm in the mood for chicken.
Guy: Teriyaki chicken?
Girl: No…
Guy: Chinese Teriyaki chicken?
Girl: No…

–53rd & 6th

Overheard by: Pooja

Posted on October 26, 2009
Ethnic Food, Food, Girls, Guys, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Questions

I'm Matthew Now

Elated girl, seeing guy: Matt?!
Guy: No.

–14th & 6th

Posted on October 26, 2009
Girls, Guys, Names, Questions, The Village

I Kinda Regret Reading About It in Her Diary

Girl #1: My mom dated a black guy when she was younger.
Girl #2, laughing: Really!?
Girl #1: Yeah. Yo, he tore that shit up… early.

–Hunter College

Overheard by: LiDra

Posted on October 25, 2009
Age/Aging, Dating, Girls, Hunter, Laughter, Parents, Race

Though the Crabs Kinda Do Have His Eyes…

Girl #1: Getting knocked up is totally not the worst thing that can happen to you when you're sexually active.
Girl #2: For sure. I wish I was growing a little Bradley, instead of whatever it is I have brewing down here.

–Morningside Heights

Posted on October 25, 2009
Babies, Compare/Contrast, Girls, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Sex, STDs

The Best I Can Do Is a Parable

Girl #1: Oh my god, I have such a long outline to do. Save me.
Girl #2: I wish I could, but I'm Jesus.

–59st St & Lexington Ave

Overheard by: yana

Posted on October 24, 2009
Girls, Jesus, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Offers and requests, Weirdness, Wishes & desires

Her Imagination Shot Itself

Girl: So, yeah. She's campaigning for the creationists now.
Guy: Noooooooo!

–Columbia Campus

Posted on October 24, 2009
Columbia (& Barnard), Columbia University, Girls, Guys, Politics, Religion, Science

If Ever an “Aww, Snap!” Were Called For…

Average-sized girl: This stuff is beautiful! But it would look so blah on me. You're lucky you're a size 24 waist and can look so hot in this stuff.
Model-looking friend: Meh, it's overrated.
Average-sized girl: Yeah, right! Name one thing that's not cool about being as thin as you are.
Model-looking friend: Well, I kind of miss… eating. (awkward pause) And also, I'm a size 23 waist.

–Upper East Side

Overheard by: Hopes she's exaggerating

Posted on October 24, 2009
Beauty, Clothing, Compare/Contrast, Food, Friends, Girls, Height, Physical appearance, Upper East Side

Girls