Girl: God, there’s nowhere in the Lower East Side to order wine!
Guy passerby: Turn around.
Girl: No, I mean, like, in a bar.
–Outside ‘inoteca Wine Bar, 98 Rivington
Girl: God, there’s nowhere in the Lower East Side to order wine!
Guy passerby: Turn around.
Girl: No, I mean, like, in a bar.
–Outside ‘inoteca Wine Bar, 98 Rivington
Guy: Do we have to get it spayed? I mean, male cats spray — what do females do?
Girl: They whine and howl and bleed all over the place.
Guy: So they do just what you do?
Girl: Basically, yeah.
–Columbia University
Guy, after passing a lingerie boutique: Oh, and by the way, that underwear store is bad luck! Every girlfriend I’ve bought something for from there dumped me the next day!
Friend: Yeah, man, it’s like a big steaming pile of bad luck.
–Thompson St, Soho
Overheard by: You have bad taste
Dude #1: I can’t believe that random-ass bitch was there.
Dude #2: She was there?
Dude #1: Yeah. Now I have to call her.
–6 train
Overheard by: tricia
Hot lesbo to another: You already have two girlfriends — you don’t need another boyfriend!
–92nd & 2nd
Hipster guy: Well, it’s not like I’m into men, but there aren’t really any girls around right now… It’s convenient! At least I’m getting laid!
–In front of Metropolitan Bar, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Rowan
Mini thug with girlfriend. You know, baby, I just get homo sometimes.
–115th & Lenox
Wannabe lesbo: … And I was like, ‘What, just ’cause I like to sleep with men, that makes you more gay than me?!’ And she was like, ‘Uh, yeah.’
–Bedford Ave & Lincoln Pl, Brooklyn
Overheard by: equally gay
Fag hag to queer friend: She is so ruining my heterosexual life!
–42nd & 7th
Overheard by: j
Hipster dude to pals: I gotta go! I just found out this guy is bi!
–Parsons the New School for Design
Chick to another: She was a little bit bisexual in Hong Kong. But, then, who wasn’t?
–1 train
Creepster to passing blonde: Hey, you walk pretty fast. Must be good for burning calories. [Blonde ignores him and keeps walking, and creepster’s phone rings.] Hey, I just tried to talk to this girl… She must have had an iPod on.
–Union Square West
Overheard by: the first girl he tried to talk to
Law student #1: Don’t judge me — I am just trying to learn!
Law student #2: I’m not judging you. I’m also trying to learn. [Law student #1 leaves room.]Law student #3: For someone who studies all the time, he sure doesn’t get it.
–NYU School of Law
Crazy lady to cashier: Hi, how’s it going?! How are you, officer? [Extends hand] I’m Officer Anderson, from the 103rd [turns and walks out].
Cashier: I hate her…
–Miraaj Cafe, Flushing
Overheard by: just wants a gyro
Girl #1, about bonsai plant: So, you’re not going to get it?
Girl #2: No… I’ll probably kill it… I’m not good with things that don’t talk.
–Chinatown
