Guy #1: So let me get this straight, you were in the car with your mom and your sister and you were put in a sexy mood?
Guy #2: Yes.
Guy #1: Don't you think that's weird?!
Guy #2: No, I don't think they were responsible for the sexy mood.
–The Strand
Overheard by: Sara Swank
Guy #1: Yeah, I really like her but she’s already got three kids.
Guy #2: With how many guys?
Guy #1: I don’t know, three or four.
–1 train
Overheard by: crumbr
Hipster girl: When I was sixteen I dated this Jewish bisexual guy… He was so Jewish he wore a yarmulke.
Hipster guy: Did you blog about it?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Fixed Rider
Woman: I can’t tell Matt Dillon and his brother apart.
Man: I know! I thought it was Matt Dillon on Entourage.
Woman: It is Matt Dillon on Entourage.
Man: No, it’s his brother!
Woman: Nooo, it’s Matt Dillon…
Man: Wait, is it?
–1 train, 14th St
Overheard by:
Dude #1: Mmm, avocados!
Dude #2: Nature’s butter.
Dude #1: I thought butter was nature’s butter…
–34th St Diner
Overheard by: Lauren
Black guy, yelling out of his car at cute girl crossing the street: Hey! You look like yo' white boyfriend call you fat, but mama, that alllllll good!
Cute girl: I have never felt so offended and so complimented at once. (deadpan) This must be love.
–Grand Army Plaza
Overheard by: aenigma
Girl: Does your tan go away quicker when it’s cold out?
Guy #1: Yeah, it’s like why water turns white when it freezes.
Guy #2: You two are both idiots!
–58th & 3rd
Overheard by: Jester
White guy: This Chinese woman at the restaurant kept staring at me, all angry looking, and staring at my chopsticks, like I was doing something wrong with them. Like, some etiquette thing or something. I know you’re not supposed to, like, stick the chopsticks into rice.
Asian chick: Oh, yeah, you never do that.
White guy: I know! But I looked down, no rice, no nothing, I was done with my food, they were just sitting on the plate. I think maybe she was trying to get me to think I was doing something wrong so that, you know, I’d get all self-conscious.
–6 train
Straight guy #1: I saw this show on TV about guys who would date girls even if they have a penis ‘cuz they were so hot!
Straight guy #2: Penis is definitely the deal breaker for me.
–187th St & Broadway
