High school student: You know, you’re the only black guy I’ve met who isn’t an asshole.
Friend: I’m not black.
–R Train
High school student: You know, you’re the only black guy I’ve met who isn’t an asshole.
Friend: I’m not black.
–R Train
Queer: I hate Mexicans, first they jump our borders, then they don’t even attempt to speak English.
Tan chick: Fo’ reals! I’ve met some that have been here their entire lives and never bothered to learn English.
Crazy man: Oh my god! Why do you have to be so goddam racist all the time!?
Tan chick: What? I was just making a point, goddammit, I am Mexican!
(five minutes later)
Black lady: Yo! D’shaun! Get yo’ ass over here nigga!
Crazy man: I hate black people! They’re so goddamn loud, they need to shut up!
–L Train
Overheard by: shocked
Eight‐year‐old boy, matter‐of‐factly, to dorky dad: Mexican people like to put animals on their shoulders.
–108 St & Broadway
Black guy to white woman: Anyway, it turns out – and this is really weird – in Texas, they hate Mexicans as much as they hate African Americans!
–17th St & 8th Ave
Man to another: I just want to be gang‐raped by a group of Latinos.
–Chelsea
Overheard by: Mike
Exasperated woman to friend: And this is why I don’t interfere when it comes to Mexicans!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Green Star
10‐year‐old to friend: You have the same name as a short, fat Mexican boy!
–Maria Hernandez Park, Bushwick
Latino gay to white gay: You have good genes, you just don’t have the Latino gene that makes your face moisturize naturally. I’m like the Dick Clark of faggotry!
–12th & 1st
Overheard by: H‑Bomb
Teen to friend: Make sure that you’re in Guatemalan mode.
–114th & Broadway
Overheard by: Jeremy
Black man passing out leaflets: And this woman here, you know she’d love to have a big black cock in her. Don’t deny it, baby, you would.
–Outside Penn Station
Overheard by: unimpressed and skeptical
Girl to friend, unknowingly a few feet away from black guy: Thank god there’s no black people on this street.
–Steinway St
Black TA, walking in five minutes before class: Oh my god, am I early? Oh, no! I’m going against my people’s stereotype!
–Classroom, NYU
Overheard by: kpan
Asian guy to another, loudly: The black girl doesn’t sound black. How do they do that?
–Uptown W Train
Queer to another: So I want to get dreadlocks, like black people.
–W 14th & 6th
Black lady to staring white kid: That’s right little boy, this is what a black person looks like.
–Outside Toys R’ Us, Times Square
Girl: Do you think Africans take antidepressants?
Guy: I really don’t like you.
–L Train
Girl: Well, I had to explain the plot of The Diary of Anne Frank to him.
Guy: What plot? It’s a game of hide and seek, the Jews are really bad at it, the Nazis are really good. The end.
–Starbucks, Waverly & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Lotte
Mom: Why don’t you want to go to that high school?
White daughter: Because there are too many black people.
Mom: I thought you were black…
White daughter: Yeah, I used to be black by association, but now I’m Puerto Rican.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: DL
Girl #1: Do you think this Beatles shirt makes me look fat?
Girl #2: No, but regardless you’re still related to the founder of the KKK.
–73rd & Broadway
Woman #1: I think Tom was kinda weird.
Woman #2: Yeah, he was really into Nazis.
Woman #1: Yeah, there’s that.
–21st & Broadway
