Latino: It’s fucking warm, yo!
Building custodian, in heavy Trinidadian accent: So it is, mon! So it is!
Latino: The world is going to end very soon, yo!
Building custodian: Maybe so, my brotha!
Latino: No! I’m fucking serious, yo!
–151 W 26th St, Chelsea
Overheard by: jairoski
Cute guy to German flight attendant on layover: So, do you have cars in Germany?
–Barracuda
Overheard by: barkeeper
Girl: So, my mom is Jewish and my dad is Christian. Does that make me, like, bi-racial?
–Eugene Lang College
Overheard by: Still ashamed I go to school here
Hispanic high school girl: Is the Fourth of July always on a Friday?
–N Train
Overheard by: D-Law
Guy to friend: Well, that's nice, they have these machines set up for the visually impaired, but what about the deaf people?
–ATM, 38th St & Madison Ave
Overheard by: jennyooooo
Student: Is Swedish even a language?
–Columbia University
Trucker: What are you, stupid, or both?
–M86 Crosstown Bus
Latino: I took my kids to that gay pride parade they have down here. Rainbow flags everywhere. Man, you guys stole our flag!
Queer: Whose flag? Puerto Rico’s?
Latino: What?
Queer: What was the rainbow flag before it was gay?
Latino: I don’t know.
–BarMinnow, 9th & 7th, Park Slope
Overheard by: Guess I stole his flag too
Girl #1: What did she just say?
Girl #2: She said “quesadilla”.
Girl #1: Huh?
Girl #2: It’s Latin.
–AMC Empire 25, West 42nd Street
White chick: Excuse me sir, are these your bags?
Hispanic man: Yeah.
White chick: Do you mind if I sit here?
He moves his bags to another seat.
Hispanic man: Fucking white bitches! Making me move my bags! Fucking white bitches…sure bitch, sit down. There you go.
A few minutes later.
White dude: Excuse me, sir, are those your bags?
Hispanic man: Yeah.
White dude: Do you mind moving them, please?
Hispanic man: Sure, Cracker Jack cracker, I’ll move my bags so your white ass can sit.
–M14 bus
Girl: She’s Dominican? She doesn’t talk like the Dominicans!
Guy: Well, she’s very well-educated.
–Aztec exhibit, Guggenheim Museum
Latino middle school boy: Barack Obama’s gay!
Black middle school boy: No he ain’t! He’s black!
–F Train
Overheard by: West Coast Courtney
Enthusiastic 20-something: Oh, is that ciabatta? Yummy! Whenever I see ciabatta, my pussy starts to swell!
–Broadway & 13th
Random passerby: He wants a vagina. In and around his mouth.
–The Village
Cute NYU blonde: He won't like, touch my vagina with his hands. That means he's gay, right?
–Mercury Lounge, LES
Drunk Latina to drunk white girl whose boyfriend stepped out to get a paper bag: Girl, just tell him to take you home. Tell him you want to sleep tonight. Tell him your pussy is closed!
–McDonald's, 14th St & 7th Ave
Overheard by: ehka
Girl in gym: Everything on my body is flaccid, except my vagina.
–Fordham Gym
Flagrantly homosexual Hispanic drag queen: So, I was like, lookin', and I realized what we been hearin' is true! And damnnnn, he looked hot.
Equally homosexual drag queen who unfortunately retained many masculine characteristics: What?! She's a man now?!
–Outside Penn Station
Overheard by: Kat
Latino guy on cell: Oh, she’s “tearing your heart out”? You’re a fucking faggot.
–Metropolitan & Union
Overheard by: Outmacked
