Offers and requests

Girl #1: So, are you going to run away to Europe with me or not?
Girl #2: Depends on when you go.
Girl #1: I said I am running away. As in, never to return. Why the fuck does it matter when we leave?
Girl #2: Okay, I just need to get my passport. Do you think I have to have my parents sign for it?
Girl #1: Never mind, I am running away alone.
Girl #2: Good, I kind of have a life here.

–57th & Broadway

Overheard by: Girl on street

Black suit on cell : What'cha mean you can't get a job? Tupac's been dead for years and the nigga's still putting out albums!

–Center St & Pearl St

Overheard by: Big Larry

Friendly suit to friend: It's not about getting the work done! It's about…well, I don't know what it's about.

–Vessey & Broadway

Overheard by: mondo man

Suit in next office: Okay, I have officially hated today! (phone rings) No! Fuck you!

–Office Building, W 46th St

Overheard by: TheGreenCat

Guy on cell: So, did you find me a job yet? (pause) Well, I want something that isn't challenging, pays well, and doesn't care when I show up.

–NJ Transit

Overheard by: Cori

Guy on cell (about to start bank teller shift): Come on and hurry up. I'm trying to get drunk before I start my second job.

–Chase Bank, Times Square

Young woman yelling into cell after being refused entrance: Goddamn, whose dick I got to suck to get my career started? Tell me where they at!

–Lobby, Herald Square Towers

Old lady #1: Yes, but you have to admit, you did get a little crazy there.
Old lady #2: Hm, maybe.
Old lady #1: You have to admit, we are both just a little bit crazy.
Old lady #2: I don't want to talk about this anymore.

–W 10th St

Overheard by: Maybe we all are

Mr. Smith* (lifting student's backpack) That's overloaded. You need to get a boyfriend to carry that for you.
Student: I don't need a boyfriend.
Mr. Smith: Then find some sucker to carry it for you.
Student: I'm my own sucker!

–Stuyvesant High School

Overheard by: The Happy Hippie

College guy #1: Wanna see the best dildo ever?
(shows a digital camera screen to his friend)
College guy #2: Awesome, did you sit on it?
College guy #1: No, but Alissa did, her pussy is so wide.
College guy #2: So true.

–F Line

Man: I love you…you know.
Woman: Well then, you'll buy me something expensive.

–Outside Paul Smith Shop

Overheard by: Liam Shove

Man at McDonald's drive-Thru: I'll have a #1 with a Diet Coke please.
Employee: Anything else?
Man: Nope, that's it. And this is all to go.
Employee: Ya think?

–McDonald's, Bayside

Little girl: Please?
Father: I'm not paying attention to you.
Little girl: Pleeeeeeease? Do you want me to cry? I'll cry. Do you want me to cry, daddy? (holds up stuffed owl) Just get this for me and I'll be happy, please?

–Gift Shop, Museum of Natural History

Conductor on PA: (unintelligible)
Driver on PA: Uh, could you say that again, partner? I didn't get that.
Conductor: I *said* (unintelligible)!
Driver: Never mind.

–D Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Man: Who was that chef who said “Butter, butter, bring me more butter.”?
Woman: Umm, I think you just made that up.
Man: No, he said it. And he meant it, and he was right! (butters roll)

–Brazil Grill, 8th Ave & 48th