Girl: It was because her labia was so strong.
Guy: You aren't supposed to talk out of your labia.
Girl: She wasn't talking out of her labia.
Guy: It was a queef. It's still a sound.
–30th & 5th
Overheard by: Heinz
Girl: It was because her labia was so strong.
Guy: You aren't supposed to talk out of your labia.
Girl: She wasn't talking out of her labia.
Guy: It was a queef. It's still a sound.
–30th & 5th
Overheard by: Heinz
Young woman to another: But do you know how big a horse dick is?
–5th Ave & Carroll, Park Slope
Girl: I'm really tired. I'm, like, an animal activist right now.
–Parking Lot, Broadway Mall
Overheard by: Lysa
Student: I'm not that sensitive. I can watch those videos where they like, torture the animal or whatever, and then I'll go eat it.
–Cardozo Law School
Asian girl: Does this make me look like a sad Panda?
–NYU Dining Hall
Columbia girl: I'd never have asked if I knew he was the one who'd killed it. But I didn't suspect him. Who'd spend their time strangling a gerbil?
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Who'd have thought?
Guido to friend: Yo, it smells like a skunk burped up a hot dog.
–Penn Station
Lady on speaker: If you have an animal, please do not put it through the X-ray.
–LaGuardia Airport
Dude #1: Dude! You farted!
Dude #2: Dude! We're outside! What do you want me to do, hold it till we get inside?
–22nd St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Manhattman
Woman on cell: Okay, but this time please stay out of my underwear drawer.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Jess
Overconfident guy: I know, I know. You say you have a 3.7 at NYU Law, and the panties just drop.
–Dorm, NYU Law
Overheard by: holdingbacklaughter
Little old lady on park bench to another: Well, I've been stuffing my bra now, and now I can't find my money.
–Central Park West & 63rd St
Overheard by: Jen
Woman: My dog only eats my underwear. He doesn't eat my son's. He doesn't eat my husband's. Only mine! I wonder why. (pauses to think) Hmm… it must be that feminine smell.
–E 40th St
Overheard by: TMI
Livid man on cell: No! You can't have your underwear back!
–Chelsea
Well-dressed British man on cell, as he walks oddly: Listen girl, I farted so hard yesterday I blasted half my ass off. (pause) No, seriously! I am still walking funny!
–24th St b/w 6th & 7th
Overheard by: Joseph
Teenage boy to another: One time this hot bitch farted on my lap, and I didn't know what to do.
–12th St & University Place
Crazy hobo sitting on blanket: I used to wear underwear, but then I farted and left a stain, so decided no more. Can anyone spare any change?
–87th & Broadway
Overheard by: Nynanny
Girl from Louisiana: What can I say? I'm a Southern girl. I fart crawfish.
–McLean Ave, Yonkers
Woman on phone: Well, the romance is out of my life: this morning Greg came in my mouth, then straight away leaned back and farted.
–Beard St & Van Brunt St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: craig hunter
Fag hag: So, how was it?
Urban queer: Girl, it was a week ago and I'm still washing the taste of his dick outta my mouth!
–LIRR
Overheard by: Matthew
JAP girl on line: Why would I be boogieing at temple?
–H&M
Overheard by: Sandjiggie
Redhead JAP: It's too bright, I can't hear you…
–41st & 3rd
JAP: Is saving the whales still, like, a thing?
–F Train
20-something JAP on cell: I mean: I don't want to say that I live in a bubble, but the only people I've spoken to in the last week and a half are you and my doorman.
–42nd St & Lexington
Overheard by: Pete
Drunk girl: That whole drink was just Maker's Mark and a cinnamon stick, there was one shot with half Tuaca, and half cider. That's it.
Friend: Shhh! Everyone else is staring.
Drunk girl: Pshhhh! Everyone just got drunk just from hearing what was in my drink.
–Q Train
Fat black girlfriend: Remember when I used to get high and see dead people in my house?
Nerdy white boyfriend: What?
–7th Ave & 1st St
Polish guy: Dude, it smells like a midget's ass over here!
Friend: How do you know what a midget's ass smells like?
Drunk guy: He's Polish! How else would he be able to screw in a lightbulb?
–Williamsburg, Brooklyn
Overheard by: POLA
