Hipster #1: Did you ever see The Brown Bunny?
Hipster #2: No, what's it about?
Hipster #1: This guy, he's a motorcycle racist…
Hipster #2: A motorcycle racist?
Hipster #1: Yeah, he races motorcycles.
–Atlantic Terminal Target
Hipster #1: Did you ever see The Brown Bunny?
Hipster #2: No, what's it about?
Hipster #1: This guy, he's a motorcycle racist…
Hipster #2: A motorcycle racist?
Hipster #1: Yeah, he races motorcycles.
–Atlantic Terminal Target
Chick on cell: In the past three weeks, I've been to more tranny-hosted parties than non-tranny hosted parties.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Ladle
Mini-Asian teen: Well he's not a real man in the sense that he has a penis, or like, male reproductive organs.
–6 Train
Loud woman: I can't tell whether he's a lesbian or just gay.
–Bamboo 52
Overheard by: Aidan
Angry man: Suck my pussy dick!
–Canal St
Overheard by: Kaitlen
Black woman to group of friends, after watching an attractive black man walk by: Mmmmm, he so fine! I wanna stick my dick up that ass!
–Duane Reade
Bum on subway: (singing) when I go into space, I'ma take a stripper wit' me!
(woman puts a dollar bill in his cup)
Bum: I'ma take a trannie too, but the trannie cost extra!
(man puts a dollar in his cup)
Bum: La dee da!
–L Train from Williamsburg
Thug on cell: Wait, so you said you needed something for herpes? (pause) I said, you need something for your herpes? (pause) Well, I smoked a little before I came over here…
–Harlem Rite Aid
Man: Your wife! Your wife! Richard Dawkins is gonna get herpes from your wife!
–French Roast, 86th & Broadway
Overheard by: zdog
Girl on cell wearing a Puerto Rican flag bandana: I dunno, I mean, I just can't keep doing this. I don't want to get herpes again.
–Bleecker & Mercer
Overheard by: JLief
Girl on subway to friend: I've never looked at you and thought you looked like you had herpes.
–E Train
Mother to tween daughter, ecstatically hugging friend: Remember, girls: No sharing saliva. That's how you get herpes and ruin your summer.
–3rd & 92nd
Overheard by: rebecca
Tween girl to friends: Did you know kissing is good for your health?
Cashier lady: Kissing *who*?
–Loehmann’s Upper West Side
Salesman: Ah, so soly. Mr. Wong not in today.
Saleswomen: My boyfriend’s Asian. Don’t make fun of them.
Salesman: I’m not making fun of them. I’m making fun of the way they talk.
–Sales Department, SoHo
Teenage girl #1: I feel so bad so bad for her.
Teenage girl #2: Why? She brought it upon herself, I didn’t tell her to snort that coke, I didn’t tell her to roll up that $20 bill and put it in her nose.
Teenage girl #3: Let’s be honest now, it was probably only $1.
–Forever 21, Union Square
Clerk #1: Man, that’s why medicine has a expiration date. The ingredients go inactive.
Clerk #2: Nigga, are you a licensed physician or somethin’?
–Blockbuster, Broadway & 93rd
Woman in stall #1: I hate it when this happens!
Woman in stall #2: What?
Woman in stall #1: These pants! They looked so nice but they flatten my ass. My ass is flat now. I look like pancake ass!
–Fitting Room, Staten Island
Guy #1: Yo, man. I lost seven pounds. Can you believe it?
Guy #2: Oh yeah? Really?
Guy #1: Yeah, I got a fuckin’ shoestring on my pants.
Guy #2: Uh…
Guy #1: I don’t like this. I liked being fat.
–CVS, Allerton
Overheard by: Lee
Woman: Do you have any books on violins?
Sales guy: Well, we don’t have a lot about playing them, but we have some about the sensuality of it.
Woman: It’s for a child.
Sales guy: Oh.
–Borders, 57th & Park Ave
