Chick #1: You know, we’re just like robots.
Chick #2: Yeah!
Chick #1: People tell us what to do, and we have to do it.
Chick #2: We’re just like models!
Chick #1: Really?! … We’re so not models.
–Union Square
Chick #1: You know, we’re just like robots.
Chick #2: Yeah!
Chick #1: People tell us what to do, and we have to do it.
Chick #2: We’re just like models!
Chick #1: Really?! … We’re so not models.
–Union Square
Tourist guy: Look, honey! Here were are in wonderful Central Park!
Tourist guy’s wife: Really? I thought it was supposed to be bigger than this…
Tourist guy: Well, what else could it be?
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: oli
Boy inside elevator: Going up?
Boy outside elevator: I’m going down.
Boy inside elevator: Well, I’m in the elevator, and I’m going up.
Boy outside elevator: Oh…fine, be that way.
–Lafeyette Street Residence
Guy #1: Dude, you still sleeping in the closet?
Guy #2: Yeah.
Guy #1: You got an air mattress or anything in there yet?
Guy #2: Yeah, I’ve got a little mattress in there now. Still pretty sad though…I’m also drunk.
–East Campus dorm, Columbia University
Overheard by: merrellham
Tourist: Hey look, it's 42nd Street! They named it after a Broadway show.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Really? REALLY!?!
Tourist dad, as shuttle to Grand Central comes in: No! We need to take the purple to Grand Central Station, then the green!
–Times Square Shuttle Platform
Overheard by: D-Law
Male tourist, watching stranger propose underneath Christmas tree: Hey buddy, did you go to Jared?
–Rockefeller Center
Southern tourist lady, as subway stops: Oh no, I think the train ran out of gas!
–F Train
Overheard by: Matt
Southern tourist: I guess the birds ate all the hands off the statues.
–The Cloisters, Harlem
Overheard by: M@
Skinny Spanish girl: That nigga was saying how he had me moaning and screaming, but I was like, "nigga, I'm just loud–that doesn't mean you're good!"
–Ft. Hamilton Parkway, Brooklyn
Overheard by: also loud
Ghetto chick to friend: Yo…in my country, it's illegal to not please your woman. You gotta fuck her till she begs you to stop.
–116th & 1st
Overheard by: DonnaRae
Man on phone: Yeah…I just fingerblasted her for like an hour. No big deal.
–E 4th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: intern2
Mom to teenage son: And I was like "sure, have sex in my bed, it never sees any."
–Mercer & W 3rd
Girl on cell: Oh no, he's back fucking his secretary now, so I'm like, completely free!
–East Village
20-something on cell, after loud graphic sex tale: And don't you be telling anyone! I don't like strangers knowing my business.
–Express Bus to Brooklyn
After the woman sent them to the wrong place twice, my uncle went back to the information desk.
Uncle: Excuse me, but did you have to pass an IQ test to get this job?
Information lady: I’m wearing my eyeglasses.
–JFK
Male flight attendant: Ladies and gentlemen, JetBlue welcomes you to the city which all other cities are reflections of… welcome to New York.
–JFK
Overheard by: SJK
Pilot over loudspeaker: Alright folks, get into your seats quickly. You don't have to love the person next to you and this ain't a furniture store.
–JFK
Overheard by: Allie
Witty flight attendant: And in case that you have not been in a car since 1962, I will now demonstrate how seatbelts work.
–JFK
Flaming flight attendant: In the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop down in front of you. If this should occur, you may scream, then place the mask over your mouth and nose…
–JFK
JetBlue pilot: I hope you all enjoyed the flight. If you have any questions, please e-mail them to the Continental Airlines e-mail. Thank you for flying JetBlue.
–JFK
Overheard by: lonely passenger
Chick #1: Damn yo, why aren’t there aboveground trains in the city?
Chick #2: They’d crash into the buildings. Duh! Pfft.
–J train
Overheard by: maggie
Teen girl #1: Where did the stereotype that blondes are dumb come from?
Teen girl #2: Poland.
–Brooklyn Tech
Overheard by: Julie
Cashier: She gave you twelve dollars? Twenty dollars? Just give her back eleventeen.
–Rite Aid, 50th & 8th
Overheard by: maribeth
