Customer: Is that banner going to be permanent?
Cashier: For a little while.
–Forbidden Planet
Customer: Is that banner going to be permanent?
Cashier: For a little while.
–Forbidden Planet
Waitress: Hello. How can I help you?
Kid: I wanna buy some sushi.
Waitress: You want to buy some sushi? What kind of sushi would you like?
Kid: I don’t know.
–Wasabi Sushi, Bensonhurst
20-something Intellectual: Facts are such a distraction from the essence of what’s really happening.
–Private Party, Brooklyn
Overweight woman: “I honesty think there must be a shortage of fabric or material because all shirts are baby tees and all pants are to small and low on the hips, I dont get it”
— Manhattan
Middle-aged Man: “you know how people all over the world, chinese, african, whatever, they look different”
Middle-aged woman: “”well no matter where you go the chickens of the world, they look the same, ever thought about that”
Middle-aged Man: “I wonder if they speak the same language?”
— McDonald’s, by the corner of Houston & Hudson
Yuppie: “Is Freddie Prinze Jr. Harry Connick Jr.’s son?”
— Streetcorner in Midtown
Yuppie #1: I admire the fact that your friends are so intelligent. Most people I speak to are single cell organisms, undergoing mitosis as I speak.
Yuppie #2: Then why do you speak to them?
Yuppie #1: They’re the only ones who call me
— Bond Street Starbucks
Woman upon seeing a Mariachi band walk by: Why do they have tambourines on their legs?
— Manhattan
Cop: Come on, you’re coming with me.
Educated youth: Naw, man! I got my third right amendment! My third right amendment!
–42nd & 7th
Male Employee: No, that’s hemophilia. Hypoglycemia is, like, when your
body produces more sugar than your system can handle.
Female Employee: Yeah! That’s me!
–Lord & Taylor
Overheard by: Megan Buckley
