Kid yelling: What are we doing after dinner? [Parents ignore him] What are we doing after dinner?!
Mom, calmly: Stop yelling, or I’ll have to kill you.
–10th St, between Broadway & University
Overheard by: Calling the Morgue
Kid yelling: What are we doing after dinner? [Parents ignore him] What are we doing after dinner?!
Mom, calmly: Stop yelling, or I’ll have to kill you.
–10th St, between Broadway & University
Overheard by: Calling the Morgue
Homeless guy sleeping in cart wakes up at eight a.m.: Good noon! … Is it noon yet?
Passerby: Not yet, but you’re very close.
–West 4th St
Drunk NYU dude: Dude, check it out! Spartacus!
Tipsy NYU dude: What?!
Drunk NYU dude: See? Spartacus!
Tipsy NYU dude: Dude, that says, ‘Supercuts.’
–11th St & University Pl
Dad: … And how do you know when we’re in the Village, sweetie?
Tween girl: Hipsters?
Dad: Uh, no, I was talking about that sign [points to ‘Welcome to Greenwich’ sign].
Tween girl: Oh.
–Bleecker & MacDougal
Crazy hobo: Yo, can I have five dollars?
Girl: Excuse me? Who the fuck do you think you are?
Crazy hobo: Bitch, I’ll fuck you up! Give me five dollars!
Girl: I’ll give you five dollars when you start respecting me!
Crazy hobo: Give me a dollar?
–7th & Grove
NYU guy #1: Do you think if the crane falls on us I can get an extension on my midterm?
NYU guy #2: Definitely, man.
–3rd Ave & 14th St
Woman #1: I just come home to problems.
Woman #2: I come home to everything nice.
Woman #1: No, I just have problems. It’s always problems with him!
Woman #2: My cat is just right there, and he’s always fine and doesn’t complain, and that’s why I just love having a cat instead.
–Pine St & William St
Overheard by: why i don’t have a cat
NYU chick: No, that can’t be true.
NYU dude: I’m dead serious — I couldn’t make that up!
NYU chick: So, you are honestly telling me that if you don’t wash your ball sack, you will grow cheese?
–10th St, between 5th Ave & University
Teen hippie: I hate the system with a passion. It’s so systematic, I want to kill its children.
Friend: Dude, we are its children.
–Greenwich Village
Angry guy: I can’t believe they put up fucking scaffolding on my building!
Friend: What’s the big deal?
Angry guy: Once they put it up, it never comes down. And you never see anyone ever working on it.
Friend: It’s just scaffolding. Dude, you need to get laid.
–5th Ave & 12th St
