Wednesday Will One-Liner Anything That Moves

50-something actress: I'm one of the founding sluts.

–Chelsea Studios

Overheard by: Joshy Sweetpants

Guy on cell: That's what I said: I fucked him, but I'm not attracted to him.

–81st & Columbus

Overheard by: Flooey

Adorable seven-year-old kid on bike: She liked it. Ashley liked it. Ashley's a whore.

–Havemeyer & 2nd, Williamsburg

Overheard by: Nathalie & Noah

Girl on cell: Well, I'm in a different place now. Now I'm a slut.

–W 4th & 6th Ave

Teenage girl on cell, beaming, as if she just had a revelation: Oh, I forgot you're a whore! (yelling triumphantly) You're a whore!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Emilia

Posted on November 3, 2014
Actors, All Wednesday One-Liners, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Girls, Guys, Insults, Kids, On Cell, One-liners, Penn Station, Promiscuity, Sex, Street, Teens, The Village, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Williamsburg

No More Montessori School for You, Young Man.

Gangster to son: Yo, nigga, you better not do crack when you grow up.
Gangster son: When I be big, I'ma be a dancer!

–Broadway & Laffayette

Overheard by: alexjeff

Posted on November 2, 2014
Age/Aging, Dancing, Drugs, Gangstas, Kids, The Village

Dating in NYC: A Short Story

Asian chick #1: The thing is, he’s a Jewish guy? And like, ya know, a lot of Jewish guys are in to Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah?
Asian chick #1: Yeah. I think it’s like because, like, both cultures are so, like, into family? Like Jews are really into family and Asians are really into family?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: But also? I think he kind of has an Asian fetish?
Asian chick #2: I hate that.
Asian chick #1: Yeah. He’s like…ya know. A nerdy Jewish guy who likes to date Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: Yeah, but he’s really cute in that way that he’s nerdy but he loves Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.

–N/R 8th street station

Posted on November 2, 2014
Asians, Dating, Family Ties, Jews, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, Subway stations, platforms, etc., The Village

Imagine How Rude People Would Be Without the Courtesy Cops

Hobo, eating a chicken kebab: I want me some pussy. I don’t care where it’s from. I just really want me some pussy to fuck. I wanna make her pussy go (sticks tongue out of mouth) pfffffffff.
Girl on street: Alright. That’s enough.

–W 4th & Broadway

Overheard by: KTandSheila

Posted on November 1, 2014
Athletes, Creepsters, Default, Etiquette, Girls, Hobos, Offers and requests, Sexuality, Street, The Village, Vagina, Wishes & desires

It Took Him 50 Years, But He Got Her to Leave Scientology

Old man: No. Do not do that.
Old woman: I’m not! I’m really not!
Old man: Looking for the truth? That’s for idiots. That’s for morons. Trying to take the facts into your own hands? That’s for idiots. Don’t do it.
Old woman: I know! I’m not!

–14th & 6th

Posted on October 26, 2014
Advice, Men, Old People, The Village, Women

“Only if you go to the right sites.”

Little boy: Mom, can I download you?

–Barnes & Noble, Astor Place

Posted on October 26, 2014
Boys, Family Ties, Internet, One-liners, Parents, Store, The Village

Then Why's That Guy Sashaying?

Concerned girl crossing street: But the light says “Don't walk”!
Amused friend: Right…so we run!

–Broadway & Houston

Overheard by: I was sauntering, personally

Posted on October 24, 2014
Friends, Girls, Stupidity, The Village, Weirdness

How Jared Was Shamed Into Living

Kid on cell: I am about to kill myself because of you!
Hobo in wheelchair: Do it! Do it! You haven’t got the balls!

–Prince between Mulberry & Mott

Overheard by: Hashashin

Posted on October 22, 2014
Hobos, Kids, On Cell, Suicide, The Village

Rat: I'll Be With You Forever, Too

Guy #1: Wow, did you see that rat? Where did it come from?
Guy #2: It came out of nowhere, just like my herpes.

–Prince Street & 6th Ave

Posted on October 20, 2014
Compare/Contrast, Default, Guys, Questions, STDs, The Village

Wednesday Bites the Big One-Liner

Teen scene girl: And that's a whole fucking different story! You always said you wanted to die having a heart attack in a car!

–57th & 3rd

Overheard by: Duluthian

Guy in line: I haven't had a corn dog since Jim Belushi died.

–Nathan's, Coney Island

Creepy guy on cell: Hey. Did you hear about the Craigslist killer? Yeah, isn't that a great idea?

–Penn Station

20-something irritated man on cell: Dude, stop freaking out! They're probably not going to do the autopsy for another three days.

–8th Ave & 15th St

Conductor: Please, no one cross cars, if the train makes a turn you will fall through, get crushed and die, thank you and have a lovely evening. Oh, and it's lovely to be alive.

–Amtrak Train to Penn Station

Overheard by: Paige

Posted on October 17, 2014
About Celebrities, Accidents, All Wednesday One-Liners, Anger Management, Cars and Driving, Conductors, Coney Island, Creepsters, Death, Girls, Guys, Happiness, Health and Hygiene, Insults, Internet, Junk Food & Fast Food, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Murder, On Cell, One-liners, Passengers, Penn Station, Public Transportation, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Street, Teens, The Village, Time, Trains Not Subway, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Wishes & desires

The Village