Construction worker: Hey beautiful, you have a lovely day.
Young girl: I'm fourteen, you perv!
Construction worker: Ay, puta…
Young girl: And I speak Spanish!
–9th St & University
Construction worker: Hey beautiful, you have a lovely day.
Young girl: I'm fourteen, you perv!
Construction worker: Ay, puta…
Young girl: And I speak Spanish!
–9th St & University
Chick: Can I make a request?
DJ guy: Sure, if I got it….
Chick: Can you play some black music?
DJ guy: By “black music” you mean music performed by black people?
Chick: Yeah!
DJ guy: Do you mean Chuck Berry black music or, like, DMX black music?
–Motor City Bar, Ludlow Street
Overheard by: DR
Big black lady: Oh, honey! What’s wrong, baby?
Weeping white girl: Oh… It’s nothing. I’ll be okay.
Big black lady: Boy problems?
Weeping white girl: … Yeah.
Big black lady: What did he do to you, dear? Did he… Did he beat you?
Weeping white girl, trying not to laugh: No! No, it was nothing like–
Big black lady: –Did he sleep with another woman?
Weeping white girl: No, he–
Big black lady: –Because if he did he’ll get an STD and die, don’t you worry.
–115th & Broadway
Girl #1: What does the Pope wear when he like sleeps? Does he always wear the huge robe and tiny little hat?
Girl #2: Ha, ha! Wow, You just totally blew my mind.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Michelle Smith
Girl #1: Well, this is cozy.
Guy #1 from the back: Let’s get to know a little about each other. Hi, my name’s Aaron*. I’m a Pisces, non-smoker, but a heavy drinker.
Girl #2: Hi, I’m Becca. I’m a Taurus, and I really like Chinese food.
Guy #2: This is the best elevator ever.
Girl #3 as door opens: Get the fuck off of me.
–Track 3 elevator, Penn Station
Teen girl #1: We have to get in line over here…
Teen girl #2: You can just shut up and lick me!
–Bowery Ballroom
Overheard by: Rhiannon
Girl #1 (about girl #2's ex): But would you shoot him?
Girl #2: Yeah. Wellll… Maybe not in the face. I mean, I don't know if I would have the heart to, like, shoot him. At least not in the face. But I would stab him. Definitely I would stab him. No questions asked.
–N Train
Overheard by: Thea Colton
Black hipster girl being given directions: Huh? Crosswalk? What is a “crosswalk”?
Shop girl: Honey, I'm from Ohio and I know what a crosswalk is!
–Vintage Store, West Broadway
Overheard by: Murray
Girl #1: He used to travel all the way from Minnesota to see my mom.
Girl #2: Wasn't he married?
Girl #1: Yeah, and it turned into real big mess. Eventually, my mom got into a fight with all his cousins, and then stabbed his mom.
–Q46 Bus
20-something man on cell: I just bought another Transformers t-shirt. That means I am one Transformers t-shirt away from being able to only wear Transformers t-shirts.
–9th Ave & 45th St
Overheard by: Serena
Male art teacher: What's wrong with chiffon? If I were home right now, I would be wearing chiffon.
–Hunter College High School
Bar owner to college kid wearing suit: Look atchu all dressed up. What, are you goin' on a game show or somethin?
–Citi Bar
Overheard by: Lulu
20-something girl on cell: You should've known when you liked his clothes that he was going to be overly emotional. No one who dresses that good can hold it all together.
–Locker Room, Crunch Gym
Guy to group of friends: Yeah, so I said to him, "Mike, it's a problem when you wearin' the same clothes as your daughter.'"
–5th Ave & 14th St
Overheard by: Sue
