Tired commuter: I'm just gonna sit here…I'm too tired to stand.
(she squeezes in small space between two girls.)
Angry girl: You know, you shouldn't touch people's thighs!
Tired commuter: Ooooh, you need Jesus!
–Uptown A Train
Overheard by: …because that logically follows?
Girl #1: So how's your break going?
Girl #2: Oh, you know, I've been stumbling upon a lot.
–Mulberry St
Ditzy blond fashion plate: So, I've called her like five times, and I feel kind of stupid, 'cuz it's just lip gloss, but it was like a $38 lip gloss, and I really want it back.
Ditzy brunette fashion plate: Everyone on the train is totally laughing at us.
Ditzy blond: Yeah, I mean it is just lip gloss. Really good lip gloss, though.
Ditzy brunette: Whatever, lip gloss is important!
–Commuter Train, Penn Station
Overheard by: afalpi
Redhead: Do you keep a standard diary?
Brunette: No.
Redhead: You should. Winston Churchill did, and Winston Churchill won World War II.
Brunette: I think Hitler had a diary, too.
–Fort Greene Park
Overheard by: Lulu
Girl, pointing at hose lying on sidewalk: Daddy, is that to make the rats stop smoking?
Dad: Yes.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: MPW
Columbia girl, looking at cell phone: Oh shit, I have like five missed calls from State Department! Should I call them back? Is it too late now?
Columbia guy, bewildered: What? The State Department?
(girl's cell phone rings)
Columbia girl: Hi, daddy. Well, I realize that, but I just got them. Well, do you think it's too late to call back now? Okay, I'll call them ASAP.
Columbia guy: What did your dad say?
Columbia girl: He told me that when the State Department calls, you should probably answer.
–Le Monde, Morningside Heights
Overheard by: bored prof
Teenage girl on cell: Yo, we just got a new game, you wanna come over?
Teenage boyfriend: (mumbles)
Teenage girl on cell: All you gotta do is get high.
Teenage boyfriend: (mumbles).
Teenage girl on cell: And drunk.
–7th Ave & 50th
Overheard by: Aaron
Girl conducting movement workshop: Can you tell us about your experience with dance?
Girl in workshop: Well, I like to dance naked around fires. Oh, I'm a pagan.
–Hunter College School of Social Work
Gay guy: I'm the understudy? How does this make sense? I'm so good and Greg is so awful.
Girl: Yeah, I don't know.
Gay guy: It's like Brad Pitt being cast as an extra for Pauly Shore's new movie. And I'm Brad Pitt!
–8th & 30th
Overheard by: Rob Anderson
5-foot Asian high school girl to friend: So where is your college anyway?
5-foot Asian college friend: Umm…in the Bronx.
5-foot Asian high school girl: Is that like north of the city or something?
5-foot Asian college friend: Umm…maybe, but I don't think so.
–Rilo Kiley Concert, Terminal 5
