So, Why’d God Break Your Hip, Myrtle?

Old lady #1: … And now he’s crippled!
Old lady #2: Well, of course he is. That’s what God does to people who get divorced.
Old lady #1: That’s true.

Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Voudou

Posted on January 31, 2017
God, Maladies, Old folks, Relationships, Wisconsin

This Site Thanks God for Crazies

Crazy: … And we got to thank God! Thank him for the babies, for all our little children…! And we got to thank Him for creating sexual intercourse so we can make those babies! And we got to thank God for French fries!

UC Berkeley
California

Overheard by: Lauren agrees with this Man

Posted on August 1, 2016
California, Crazies, God

If You're Forging, Try to Spell His Name Correctly This Time

Professor: No, pondering eternal truths is not a good excuse for missing my class…I'd need a signed note from god.

Lycoming College
Williamsport, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: JQ

Posted on March 8, 2016
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, God, Offers and requests, Pennsylvania, Philosophy, Teachers

Is That What Jesus Would Do?

Catholic school girl #1: (sings “Total Eclipse of the Heart”)
Catholic school girl #2: Stop it. I swear to god, I will shank you.

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Overheard by: Adelaie

Posted on February 15, 2016
Default, Girls, God, Louisiana, Music, Offers and requests, Students, Threats

God: Suddenly I’m Getting All the Attention I Deserve

Professor, whispering: What is god doing with female breasts?

Oglethorpe University
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Caylin

Posted on August 1, 2015
Body parts, Class, Education, Georgia, God, Questions, Sexuality, Teachers, Weirdness

Smells Like He Needs a Bath

Teenage girl: God is in every queef.

Albuquerque, New Mexico

Posted on July 16, 2015
Default, Girls, God, New Mexico, Philosophy, Sex

Yeah, That “God” Bit Was a Slick Cop-Out

Girl to pregnant friend: You're just like Mary, mother of Jesus…except she knew who the father was.

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on July 10, 2015
Canadia, Compare and contrast, Default, Family ties, Girls, God, Jesus

What If It's All True, Though?

Teenage girl: But you don't actually believe god made the world in seven days.
Teenage boy: No.
Teenage girl: And you believe in evolution and the dinosaurs?
Teenage boy: Yes.
Teenage girl: How come?
Teenage boy: Because a world that never had dinosaurs is a world I want no part of.

Adelaide
Australia