Guy #1: I mean, if it's a noose, it's better to have a drop than just hang there.
Guy #2: Yeah, no way, man.
Guy #1: On the other hand, if it's a meat hook, a drop would do some serious internal damage.
–W 35th & 9th
Guy #1: I mean, if it's a noose, it's better to have a drop than just hang there.
Guy #2: Yeah, no way, man.
Guy #1: On the other hand, if it's a meat hook, a drop would do some serious internal damage.
–W 35th & 9th
Little gangster kid: Yo, the last time I went fishing I got a fishing lure stuck in my dick.
–Prospect Park, Brooklyn
Hobo: Everybody’s somebody on my dick!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Rebecca
Girl, to male co-worker: Can you be a little more subtle and not such a dick-swinger about your Amstel Light?
–Conde Nast Bldg, 57th & 8th
Overheard by: Kenzi
Woman: At least I don’t suck dicks for free!
–Broadway and Putnam, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Tommi
Drunk college student: My redeeming factor is I will suck fucking dick to make money.
–Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: dank
Guy on cell: Take it like a bowl of dicks.
–14th & 5th
Overheard by: Johnny Bonsanto
Fat guy: So I asked her, and she gave me her number, and then it was disconnected. So I went back the next week, and she wasn’t working there anymore. So I wondered, did she quit her job just to avoid sucking my dick?
–Bleecker & Sullivan
Overheard by: Caroline
Girl: I gotta buy a new hair dryer.
Guy: You just got one like two weeks ago!
Girl: Yeah, I know, but I don't like it. I mean, it dries my hair, but not the way I like.
Guy: (sighs)
–E 84th St
Overheard by: Lisa Freestone
[guy takes a flyer]Flyer guy: Hey, do you want to know about…
Guy interrupting: No.
[guy goes into revolving door and flyer guy follows him into the same section of the door and stops it]Flyer guy: Don’t be such a jerkwad, I want my flyer back.
–68th St Loews
Overheard by: LSB
Tween girl #1: That’s a girl’s shirt!
Guy in light blue shirt with pink flower on the back that says ‘Mom’s Weekend ’04’: No, it’s not. It’s a man’s shirt.
Tween girl #2: No, that’s a girl’s shirt you have on.
Guy: I’m not going to explain irony to a 12-year-old.
–Target, Queens
Overheard by: Oh, Queens
Dude with chick to group of smokers outside bar: We are going to eat pork chops and fuck.
–Bleecker and Crosby
Gay male on cell: …Do you really think I would try his sausage balls?
–53rd St & 8th Ave
Budget Vin Diesel: I love bacon. If I could, I would put bacon in my cereal.
–Sunburnt Cow, Avenue C
Overheard by: LeahPia77
Hispanic deli worker: Es muy barato, como la carne de gato.
–10th & Broadway
Overheard by: Anna Pilar
Black man, to Jewish friend: You’re not Jewish. You had bacon at your baby’s naming ceremony. Thickest, juiciest most delicious bacon I ever ate in my life. You named your kid Samuel and you had bacon. Delicious, delicious bacon.
–A Train
Man on cell phone: The sausages! I mean, I don’t feel bad for the hot dogs. But, the sausages?!
–41st and 7th
Overheard by: Justin
Good looking brunette: Yeah, then we talked about physics.
Intrigued girl pal: Oh, really? Why?
Good looking brunette: Not sure, but I remember it turned me on.
Intrigued girl pal: Oh…
(awkward silence)
Hot guy pal: (nods head)
Good looking brunette: What? I really like physics! Its the math… I really like math.
–Park Ave
Overheard by: angela
Woman: Hi, I just realized today that my wallet was stolen a month ago.
–Chase Manhattan, Broadway & 73rd
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Guy: I’ll have a Mahatma grande.
–Starbucks, Broadway & 98th
Lady: If it was a real fortune-teller or whatever, they’re not supposed to charge you, right?
–78th & 2nd
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Guy: This song Ring of Fire is about Johnny Cash falling in love with June Carter.
Girl: Really? I thought it was about a rimjob.
–Pink Pony, Ludlow Street
Overheard by: Michael Roche
Guy on cell talking loudly: Where the fuck are you, Emily? (pause) Are you shopping? Don't lie to me, Emily! I will come over there and fucking beat the dogshit out of you. (pause) I don't care if I go to jail, it will be worth it to slap your lying ass around. (pause) You don't buy me shit, Emily. Do you buy me my underwear? No! Do you buy me socks? No! I do. What about all those purses and shoes you have? Me!
Random Dominican teenage girl: Damn, Emily really don't buy him nothing.
–Lucky Star Bus
Overheard by: chinatown bus traveler
