Tween #1: You called me gay? I’ll sue you!
Tween #2: You’re gay for even saying that.
–Elizabeth & Mott
Overheard by: stephin’ out
Tween #1: You called me gay? I’ll sue you!
Tween #2: You’re gay for even saying that.
–Elizabeth & Mott
Overheard by: stephin’ out
Woman #1: I call her a dirty slag, she calls me a fat cow. You know.
Woman #2: Yeah.
Woman #1: But she says it in the most proper British accent, so I don’t really mind.
Woman #2: Yeah, if I’m insulted in a foreign language, what do I care?
–13th & 7th
Chick: You can tell this is the comics section ’cause all the fat, ugly people are here.
Dude: You’re gonna get lynched.
–Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: Javier G.
Guy on cell: Yo, did you get me my plane ticket? I need to fuck this guy up and get the hell out of here.
–MacDougal St
Overheard by: Lauren
Metro NY guy: Take the fuckin’ paper!
–42nd & Vanderbilt
Overheard by: didn’t take the fuckin’ paper
Hipster boyfriend to hipster girlfriend: You can go fuck, fuck, fuck yourself, and I don’t fucking care, you fuck.
–Bleecker & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Patty K.
Guy on cell: Fucking? Are you Fucking?…Beating off?…What’s that sound?…I don’t know; I’m out of guesses!
–14th & 5th
Overheard by: Thompson
Construction worker, building a new school: So we fucked it up. It’s Friday anyway. I don’t have to look at it no more.
–35th St & 35th Ave, Astoria
Overheard by: Jillian B.
Suit: And now she wants to be involved in my strategic planning initiative? Fuck her!
–Rockefeller Plaza
Overheard by: Brendan Rogak
Little girl, receiving a stuffed frog from her parents: Fucking frog!!
–122nd & Amsterdam
Overheard by: frog-waiting-to-be-kissed
Guy: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to insult your computer. I didn’t know it was a cheap computer. I’m sorry.
Girl: You didn’t insult my computer. You insulted my socio-economic status.
–7th St between A & B
3-Year-Old boy, putting both hands on butt of woman in front of him: Mooove!
Pushed woman: You shouldn’t let your boy do that.
Mother: What do you expect him to do? He’s got a big ass in his face!
–59th & Lex
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Chick #1: Blowjobs, yeah, it takes practice. After you do it three or four times you get the hang of it.
Chick #2: Have you ever done black?
Chick #3: No, but it’s so disgusting. Just imagine a black…thing in your mouth. Eww.
Chick #1: It is pretty nasty. It must taste really bad, too.
–Uptown F train
Overheard by: Ting
Conductor on loudspeaker: Stand clear of the closing doors! [long pause] Retard!
Loud girl: What did he say?
Conductor on loudspeaker: Yes, I called him a retard!
–PATH train, WTC station
Overheard by: didn’t hold the doors
Guy, watching a toddler have a meltdown on the sidewalk: Where’s Susan Smith when you need her?
–Hudson & Jane
Overheard by: jose clunie
College girl: Mom, I can’t babysit them. Mom! Listen to me! I’m sorry, I don’t like babies. I find we have very little in common.
–34th & Broadway
Lady: I don’t know if that woman ever found her baby’s head!
–King’s County civil court, Brooklyn
Overheard by: kate s
Mother to infant: I’m so glad you’re getting a personality now! You used to just sit there and bore the fuck out of me. I wasn’t sure if I was going to love you! You’re not going to remember that, are you? [to friend] Is she?
–Water St & Hanover Sq
Overheard by: zack
Guy surrounded by kids: You’re all a bunch of savages. Little savages, that’s what you are!
–151st & Broadway
Overheard by: Pants
Woman to baby in stroller: No crying! Crying is unacceptable. I don’t care how bored you are. [to clerk] Does this come in pink?
–J Crew, Tme Warner Center, Columbus Circle
Lady on cell: No, she don’t like anyone. She mean as shit…Nah…Nah…She don’t even like her own children.
–Port Authority
Queer #1: What did he just say?
Queer #2: He called you maricon. It means faggot in Spanish.
Queer #1: Oh, thank God. I thought he called me Mexican. I was about to be really offended.
–Lorimer St, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Ray
