Girl #1: This neighborhood has changed so much.
Girl #2: I know, I feel like we live in the ghetto now. There were actually children outside this morning. And they were yelling!
–N. 7th, Williamsburg
Girl #1: This neighborhood has changed so much.
Girl #2: I know, I feel like we live in the ghetto now. There were actually children outside this morning. And they were yelling!
–N. 7th, Williamsburg
Frazzled mother to young child: Hurry. Hurry. Look, the monster is going to get you if you don't walk faster!
–Queens Mall
Mother to small child: If you eat your two pieces of chicken, I'll give you a raisin.
–College Point Shopping Center
Overheard by: Yesenia
Mom speaking to son: Sweetie, do I look like a eggbeater?
–Waterside Plaza
Woman on bus to child with large hearing aid: Sit down properly! Are you listening to me?
–M23 Bus
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Mother to whiny toddler: I can't listen to you anymore! I fear for both of us.
–15th St & University Place
Overheard by: Sarah M.
Mother to screaming child: Please stop crying and put your coat on. I am not hurting you or torturing you, so please stop crying.
–4th Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: olivejuice
Father to kid who just started crying: Hey, stop! I thought I told you to wait until we got home!
–Park Slope, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Lucian
Guy to girl, on Valentine's Day: You look fat when you cry.
–Cobble Hill
Overheard by: MJB
Hispanic man on phone to girlfriend: Ma, why you cryin?! You should be breaking up with me because I hit you!
–Staten Island Ferry
Guy to girlfriend: I'm sorry I pulled your hair while you were crying.
–Bowery & 2nd
Little white boy to frustrated black nanny who is trying to hail a cab: My daddy always gets a taxi!
–Houston & Broadway
Overheard by: Dan
Little boy: This place is like a dead zoo.
–American Museum of Natural History
Four-year-old boy: Yo, this sofa is mad comfy!
–Used Furniture Store, Staten Island
Four-year-old boy: That’s enough, I’m calling Interpol!
–A Train
Overheard by: Swarles
Little girl to mom after terrible Skyride attraction: Mommy, can we never do this again?
(random guy behind her starts laughing) Stop it! Stop laughing at me!
–Empire State Building
Overheard by: Claire
Eight-year-old boy: This museum is inappropriate.
–The Metropolitan Museum of Art, Greek & Roman Sculpture Wing
Overheard by: Taylor
Eleven-year-old girl, listening to iPod: Ok, so I can’t listen to any high school music, right?
Her nine-year-old sister: Yeah.
Eleven-year-old girl: Ok, just making sure.
–Metro-North, Harlem Line
Overheard by: jenny’s hero
Mother, about her hyperactive child: Looooong day. Long day, and too much ice cream.
Hyperactive child: No.
–King Tut Exhibit, Times Square
Overheard by: Sarah
[A woman is dragging a five-year-old boy into the women’s restroom.]Boy: I don’t want to go in.
Woman: Come on, it’ll only take a minute.
Boy: But you can wipe your ass by yourself now!
–Times Square
Little boy: You can’t tell.
Mom: Yes, you can sense it. It’s called gaydar.
–Central Park
Yuppie screenwriter girl: So I was a very precocious child. Or whatever, y'know. And I just wanted to explore that dynamic a little bit? Basically it's a buddy picture between the little me and the big me.
–14th & 8th
Yuppie woman: And what do I say to that? "I have a smack habit, give me money"!
–St. Mark's Place
Yuppie man: If I hear "breast milk cupcakes" one more time…
–Outside Gotham Bar and Grill
Yuppie, thoughtfully: It's not the mustard, it's what the mustard represents!
–Food Emporium, 2nd Ave
Bro #1: Dude, I don't know, every day this week she's been upset. Crying about something, then apologizing…
Bro #2: Solid. You guys should make kids.
–4 Train
