Girl #1: He used to hang out at Bungalow 8 and do coke with Joaquin Phoenix all the time.
Guy #1: That’s so cool!
Girl #2: How can Joaquin Phoenix do coke? He’s a vegan!
Girl #1: Vegans can’t do coke?
Girl #2: Well, being vegan is supposedly to be all…conscious and stuff.
Guy #2: Does he think they make coke with meat?
–Williamsburg
Overheard by: ~dana
Suit on cell: And three girls we know will be there. They're all hideous. But at least they're girls.
–28th & 5th
Overheard by: Heinz
Man in suit: The building is surrounded by outside. Right before you go in and when you come out, you are outside!
–Downtown A Train
Overheard by: The Green Cat
Suit whining on cell: Aw, come on! I wanna be on top this time!
–Flushing
Overheard by: Zee
Suit: The only time I wore socks last year was during my swearing in.
–Maiden & William
Suit: You know, we should probably just send a company-wide email in the morning: "hey guys, we're fucked."
–Wall St
Overheard by: Tamcakes
Comedy show guy: Comedy! You already spent money on the plane ticket to come to this stupid place, you might as well have some fun while you're here. We have black people and fried shit. Ma'am, do you want to see a comedy show?
Large black woman: No.
Comedy show guy: Why not? Are you “different”?
Large black woman: No, I live here, so I already know everything is stupid. Including your show.
Comedy show guy:: Give me a hug. That was awesome.
–46th & Broadway
Overheard by: Wes
Man: With this many books you are almost certain to make a mistake in your choice.
–The Strand
Overheard by: Jill A.
Guy: So, you don't worship Satan?
Girl: I don't believe in Satan.
Guy: So, you're an atheist?
–7 Train
Overheard by: Starisla
Mom: … So you can go to nirvana?
12-year-old girl, rolling her eyes: Nirvana isn’t a place, Mom, it’s a state of mind…
–79th & 2nd
Overheard by: Amused nanny
Chica on cell: He was just white. Like, a white guy. Except Puerto Rican.
–Park Terrace West, Inwood
Overheard by: Gringo Starr
Puerto Rican thug to another, both wearing Puerto Rican flag bandanas as face masks: White people better get used to us. There be like 80 billion of us in the world… Or maybe 8 thousand of us…at least.
–F Train
Overheard by: Brent
Teen on cell: Wait, you're in Puerto Rico? I'll be right there, that's by Chinatown, right? What do you mean it's an island? Like Staten Island? How the fuck did you get there?
–Colombus Circle
Overheard by: Graham Davis
JAP on phone: He called me a clingy JAP! How fucking low! I could've easily pulled the "you're-a-Puerto-Rican-from-Staten-Island" card.
–92nd & 5th
Guy (shouting): Hey guys! You like Puerto Ricans?!
–Times Square
Overheard by: CytoFox
Dad on scooter with eight-year-old girl: I don't want to hear that… Don't fuckin' push me, Joanna! You are not black, you are Puerto Rican!
–Flatbush & Fulton
Overheard by: Chelsea
Woman #1: Kate and I saw a snake walking down State Street yesterday!
Man: What?
Woman #2: Wait… walking?
–Central Park
Overheard by: A snake? Really?
Drunk chick #1: You like acronyms.
Drunk chick #2: And making out.
Drunk chick #1: You should marry someone who has a job making acronyms.
–9 train
Tattooed man in headphones: Hey man, you got a cigarette?
Hobo: Always.
Tattooed man in headphones: Really?
Hobo: Of course not. Look at me, I'm eating out of a trash can.
–3rd Ave & 10th St
Overheard by: Greg
