Stupidity

Chick #1: You know, a year ago I didn’t even know who Tracy Chapman was.
Chick #2: Even I knew who she was, and I’m not even black!
Chick #1: Well, I’m not black in the ways that count. I’m not outwardly, identifiably black…Well, except for my skin color.

–Broadway & 116th

Girl on phone: This is so crazy because I was just watching Gossip Girl and I was like: "Oh my god, no one has dinner at Butter!" But then you just called me and invited me to dinner at Butter! It’s totally out of control.

–Barnard College

Man: The Tudors is like Law & Order for British actors. If you can’t get a job anywhere else, there’s always that.

–Cort Theater

Overheard by: office peon

Young man to friend: It’s called Tudor Place. Hey, you know that show on showtime, The Tudors? Maybe it’s that family and they moved over here. Because the buildings do look old.

–Bryant Park

Hipster: I watched Lost one time. I watched Lost one time! A big monsoon was coming and some dude closed a door on it. Closed a door on the monsoon! I was like: "Fuck this, I’m done."

–Outside an Irish Pub, 54th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: jon

Soccer mom: Charles in Charge was a consistently good show.

–51st St & 8th Ave

Whole Foods employee #1: Yo man, do you know if we have any Kanye pepper?
Whole Foods employee #2: Nah, I think we’re out.

–Whole Foods, Union Square

Overheard by: Darling Pinky

Boy: When I was little I used to think that if the planet got heavy enough, it would start to fall.
Friend: You must have been pretty smart to even think that when you were a little kid.
Boy: But what if I still think that?
Friends: Then you're a dumb ass.

–C Train

Overheard by: Rafael DaSilva

Dude: Hi, I’m looking for the World Trade Center.
Cop: Uhhh, yeah… You need to go to Manhattan.

–Ferry Terminal, Staten Island

Overheard by: Ghost Rock It

Ditzy girl #1: It's so weird. You can actually have arguments on Facebook.
Ditzy girl #2: Yeah! You can follow people's arguments on wall-to-wall.
Ditzy girl #3: That's so stupid. Why go to all that trouble when you can just pick up your phone and send them a text?

–Downtown F Train

Overheard by: sam

Teen boy #1: Yo man, I’m gonna join a gang!
Teen boy #2: Ah, ya? What gang?
Teen boy #1: Aladdin Kings.
Teen boy #3: What the fuck kinda Disney gang is that? Latin Kings, man! Latin Kings!

–A train

Technophobic lady: There was some crazy lady talking to herself in the bank.
Tech-Savvy lady: Are you sure? Did she have a Bluetooth?
Technophobic lady: I don’t think she had any teeth.

–54th & 10th

Suit to security guard: Which elevator goes next door?

–1 Penn Plaza

Overheard by: Nora

Hot dog vendor: To go?

–Hot Dog Stand, 62nd & 3rd

Overheard by: Chrissy

Woman holding Dunkin Donuts mug to employee: Excuse me, can this mug hold cold drinks as well, or just hot ones?

–Dunkin Donuts, 76th & York

Woman: Crepe cafe? What do they do there? (comes closer) Ohhhh, they make crepes?

–Crepe Cafe Cart, W 50th St

Overheard by: Dianora

20-something girl to friend: What are we even walking for again?

–Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk, Central Park

Laughing, genuinely amazed Columbia underclassman: Isn't it, like, amazing, how we know what is food and what isn't food?

–W 114th Street b/w Broadway & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Susan Volchok

Conductor: Next stop is…where am I?

–Uptown 1 Train

Girl: Is Beirut the same thing as Beer Pong?
Guy: What?
Girl: Beirut. Is it the same thing as Beer Pong?
Guy: Beer what?
Girl: Beer Pong.
Guy: Beer Pong?
Girl: Yeah. I feel like Beirut isn’t a real sport.
Guy: Oh, is Beirut a sport?
Girl: I don’t think so. I think it’s like Beer Pong.
Guy: Oh, I always thought it was a country.

–Columbia University